Phases
by Pineapple55
Summary: A modern day story about coming out and the obstacles that come with it. Sometimes the people who are supposed to love us the most can cause the biggest problems. NarSess


Just another fucking one-shot! Hooray! =D

WARNING: mature subject matters! malexmale relationships, (after some debate) small lemon, major OOCness, AU (modern times), male(s) with a feminine side, severe depression. Don't read if you're homophobic or trans-phobic (trans only mentioned). And don't tell me that Sess is too girly or anything. I have a plan for this story and I'm sticking to it.

_This is under Nar/Sess but the main focus of this story is not with the pairing_. It's just who Sess ends up with about 5000 words in.

Okay, Sess and Inu are full brothers and their parents are Inutaisho and Izayoi. I would've used Sess's mom since she seems more like a bitch but I'm too uncreative to think of a name at the moment.

Prepare yourselves. This a long one…

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters

* * *

**Phases**

"Sesshomaru! Put that down right now!" a man with long silver-white hair and golden eyes scolded.

"Sesshomaru, what have we told you before?" the man's wife joined in.

The young five-year-old boy with the same hair and eyes as his father sadly put down the doll he had been playing with. "You told me not to play with dolls," he mumbled.

"That's right. Now where did you get that?" his mother asked as she picked it up.

"Rin gave it to me…"

"Well, the next time Rin gives you one don't take it."

"Okay."

"Now go play in the backyard with your brother," his father ordered.

"Okay." The little boy got up and slowly walked outside to where his younger brother was playing on a swing.

Once he was gone, the two parents faced each other.

"Inutaisho…" the woman sighed. "This is the third time we've caught him playing with girl toys. What are we going to do with him?"

"I don't know, Izayoi. I don't know. Let's just hope this is simply a phase."

--

Sesshomaru didn't understand. What was the big deal if he played with dolls? A lot of the girls at school did, so why couldn't he? The boys were always running around and hitting each other and getting dirty. He was the only boy who didn't like doing that stuff. He'd much rather stay inside and play with dolls and play dress up. And just what was wrong with that?

"Hi, Sesshy."

Sesshomaru looked at his little brother. He was only a year younger. "Hi, Inuyasha."

"Want to take turns on the swing?"

"Sure." He walked up to his brother and started pushing him to make him go higher.

XXXXXX

A seven year old Sesshomaru and Rin were in his room. He and Rin had been best friends since kindergarten. She was at his house and had brought things to play dress up in her backpack. Sesshomaru still got in trouble with his parents about playing with the wrong toys and not playing the right games and he still didn't understand why. He never listened to them though. At least Rin and Inuyasha never cared if he was different from the other boys.

"Here," Rin said as she handed him a pair of high heels. "Try these on."

"Okay," Sesshomaru said. He put the shoes on which were about two sizes too big. He took a few wobbly steps over to the mirror and looked at them. They were about three inches high and bright red. He liked them but jeez were they hard to walk in! "Rin, what do you think?"

"I like them. Here put this on too." She handed him some sparkly tiara.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes, come on. It's glittery."

"Fine…" He slipped it over his head. "Now how do I look?"

"Sesshomaru!"

He quickly spun around to face the now open door and an angry father. He kicked the shoes off and ripped the tiara off his head.

"Yes, Daddy?"

"…We'll talk when your mother gets home."

Sesshomaru knew he was in trouble now. His parents had never caught him playing dress up before even though it was one of his favorite things. He gloomily sat down next to Rin. She frowned. She knew that Sesshomaru's parents didn't like it when she gave him her toys and stuff. He knew his parents would be angry with him and would talk to him once Rin left.

And he was right. His parents sat him down once Rin's mom picked her up. Inuyasha was upstairs. It was only him and them.

"What did he do this time?" Izayoi asked her husband. Apparently all he had told her was that it had something to do with Sesshomaru.

"I went upstairs to check on him and Rin," he told her. "And when I opened the door I found Sesshomaru in high heels and a tiara."

Izayoi sighed then kneeled down so she was eye level with Sesshomaru. "Is this true?" she asked.

"Yes…" Sesshomaru answered.

"Sesshomaru…you can't keep doing this. You can't dress up in girls' clothing and play with girls' toys."

"But why not?!" the boy exclaimed.

"Because…because it's just not right! Boys don't act like that. You're a boy, you're going to act like one!"

"But why…?" he mumbled on the verge of tears. His parents didn't hear him though.

"Now go upstairs. Neither me nor your father better catch you doing anything like that again."

He ran up to his room. He just didn't get it. It wasn't right? Did that mean something was wrong with him? His thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock on his door.

"Come in," he said. He watched as his little brother came in, closed the door, and then sat next to him on his bed.

"Hi, Sesshy."

"Hi."

"What's wrong?"

He sighed. "Nothing. I just got in trouble again."

"Why?"

"Daddy caught me wearing girl clothes."

"Oh. But you do that all the time. What's the big deal?"

"They never saw me before. But I don't know what the big deal is…"

XXXXXX

"Sesshomaru? Um, hellooo. Sesshomaru?" Rin tried waving her hand in front of her best friend's face. That seemed to snap him out of his trance.

"Oh. What?" Sesshomaru asked.

"What was that about? You were in some sort of daze."

"I was just thinking about something."

"What?"

"Nothing important…"

Sesshomaru and Rin were eleven now. They were in sixth grade which meant they were going to graduate this year. Then they would be in junior high. They heard that it was a lot different from elementary school and they weren't sure if that was good or bad.

Rin just frowned at her friend. He seemed to space out a lot lately. She wasn't sure why. She thought that perhaps it was because of his parents.

Sesshomaru still got bothered and reprimanded by his parents. He didn't play with dolls anymore (only because he was too old now) but he still wore the occasional high heels or short shorts. Every time, his parents would yell at him to stop and to 'grow out of this damn phase already.' It hurt Sesshomaru. He was different from all the boys, he knew this already. Rin didn't care, Inuyasha didn't care, none of his other friends cared, so why did his parents? He started noticing things were different too besides his activities and clothes of choice. Most of the boys in school had started taking an interest in the girls. They would always talk about how pretty they were and how they would love to go out with this one or that one. Sesshomaru could never understand why. Sure, he was friends with a lot of the girls but he would never want to date them.

But wasn't that how it was supposed to be? Weren't boys supposed to like girls? Why was he different? Weren't boys supposed to like sports and running around? That's what his parents had been telling him since he was little. Then why didn't he want to? This is what had Sesshomaru so confused and spaced out all the time.

As time moved on, Sesshomaru had established that he wanted no part of dating. If he did, that meant he would have to go out with a girl and he just didn't want to. A lot of girls at school had asked him to be their boyfriend but he always rejected them. So Sesshomaru had unintentionally made himself into that cute, hard-to-get boy.

XXXXXX

"You nervous?" Rin asked.

"No. Why, are you?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Of course not."

Together, Sesshomaru and Rin walked onto the campus of their new junior high school for the first time. There was a lot more kids. A lot of them looked bigger and older then them. They walked around together until they found a couple of their friends.

"Hey guys!" Kohaku called. The two of them walked up to him and Jaken.

"What's up?" Rin said to them.

"Not much. Me and Jaken just found each other."

Then the bell rang. Sesshomaru ended up having to walk to his first class alone since his was on the opposite side of the school from the other three.

Overall, it ended up being a good day for Sesshomaru. He only got lost once but he thought that was pretty good for his first day. When he got home he went to Inuyasha's room to see how his day went.

"Inuyasha?" Sesshomaru said.

"Hey, Sessh."

"How was your day?" Inuyasha tried to hide a small blush. That totally meant that something juicy had happened. "What happened?"

"Well…um…"

"Spit it out!"

"I have a girlfriend…"

"No way! Who?"

"Um…well you know Kikyo?"

"You and Kikyo are going out?!"

"Hey!" Inuyasha threw a pillow at his brother. "Not so loud!" he whispered. "Mom and Dad will hear you."

"Sorry," he apologized but smiling. "So, what? Did she make the first move?"

"Yeah…but you know Kagome right?"

"Ew, yeah."

"Haha, she saw me and Kikyo kiss and she was so pissed!"

"Haha, well maybe now she'll finally catch a clue and get that you don't like her."

"I hope so. So Sesshomaru…"

"Yeah?"

"Got your eyes on anyone?"

Sesshomaru shifted uncomfortably. "Why do you ask? You know I don't."

"Well, I don't know. Maybe something changed?"

"Don't start being like Mom and Dad, Inuyasha."

"I'm not! If you don't wanna date anyone that's fine. I was just asking."

"Ugh, okay."

"So how was your day? Good?"

"Yep."

--

Sesshomaru's seventh grade year went without too many problems. It was in eighth grade when things got rougher. A few of the meaner boys didn't like Sesshomaru because he was 'different' but for the most part they left him alone. Of course he was called names sometimes but he ignored all the assholes. That is until they decided to step it up a notch.

Sesshomaru was walking to his friends' hang out at school. He was coming from class alone and decided to walk behind the classrooms to get there quicker. He didn't realize that he was being followed…

"Hey Sesshomaru!"

He didn't stop. He recognized that voice. It was Bankotsu and his gang.

"Sesshomaru! Don't you want to wear my sister's dress?" Renkotsu yelled and they all laughed. Yes, it had leaked out that Sesshomaru wore girl clothes once in awhile and that he was more feminine then most guys.

"Shut up asshole," Sesshomaru called back. Well, they didn't like that. Bankotsu and Renkotsu ran up to him.

"That wasn't very nice." Sesshomaru felt himself being shoved against the wall. He could handle their taunting but this was too much. Now he got angry.

"Get your hands off me," Sesshomaru ordered.

"Ha, you're in no position to boss me around," Bankotsu said.

Sesshomaru had to make a decision. Either he was going to let himself get pushed around or he was going to show these guys that they couldn't fuck with him. Sesshomaru glared at him then shoved his knee up. It connected with Bankotsu's stomach and he let him go. Renkotsu made a grab for him as the others came running up. Sesshomaru ran off, smart enough to know that if he stayed he would get his ass kicked.

"You fucking faggot!" Bankotsu yelled gripping his stomach. "Why the hell are you so gay?"

Sesshomaru heard him just fine but didn't stop. When he reached his friends, they immediately questioned him. He was panting and had a strange expression on his face.

"Rin," he said once he caught his breath. "Come with me."

Once they were alone, she spoke.

"Sesshomaru, what happened to you?" she asked.

He explained what happened. The only thing he left out though was the last thing Bankotsu said. _Gay?_ _Me? _He knew what gay meant but never did he think it applied to him_…Gay?_

"Oh Kami…" Rin muttered. "Sesshomaru…"

Sesshomaru hid his confusion for the moment and replaced it with anger. "Don't worry. I won't let those bastards get the best of me."

That night, Sesshomaru thought long and hard. He lay awake for hours thinking about Bankotsu's words.

_Gay…that would mean I like guys, not girls. I don't like girls, I already established that. But…would that explain why I like girl things? No…liking girl things has nothing to do with what gender I like._

Then a thought popped into Sesshomaru's head. This was too confusing for one person…what if he talked to someone who was gay? Maybe they could help him out. But who was gay at their school?

_Hojo._

Hojo was in their same grade but a year older. He was fourteen and had come out last year. Sesshomaru wasn't really friends with him but since Hojo knew Rin…

_But what do I say?_

Sesshomaru groaned to himself before forcing the whole situation out of his head. He'd worry about it tomorrow at school.

--

Sesshomaru was sitting quietly next to Rin. It was lunch and Hojo had decided to come over. He and Rin were chatting away while the rest of the people (besides Sesshomaru) had their own conversations.

_Come on, this is your chance. Just ask._

"Okay, Rin," Hojo said. "I should get back to the others."

"Okay, Hojo. I'll see you next class."

He turned to leave.

"Wait, Hojo."

He turned back around to see who had called him. _Sesshomaru? _"What's up?" Hojo asked.

Sesshomaru was nervous but he needed to talk to someone…someone who could possibly understand him. "Can I talk to you…alone?" he asked.

"Well, sure. Come on."

They walked off to a grassy area. A few seventh graders were running around but they were out of earshot.

"Now what is it you wanted to talk about?" Hojo asked.

Sesshomaru kept his gaze downcast. "Um…well how did you…how did you know you were gay?"

He whispered so quietly that Hojo almost didn't hear him. He smiled a little though when Sesshomaru asked. _This poor boy is confused._ "Well, for me it started when my best friend Koga got his first girlfriend. I was eleven or twelve. I began to realize that I didn't like girls the way others did. So, I tried looking at guys. To put it simple, I discovered that guys were the way to go for me."

"Oh…I heard that you came out last year."

"Yeah, I did. For the most part, people were okay with it. I mean my parents weren't too keen on the fact I liked boys but they've gotten use to it. Almost all my friends were okay too. Some of the kids at this school though are assholes. I still get a few problems but nothing major."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. So, the people you're close to accepted it?"

"Yes. I was lucky. Not everyone's family is as accepting unfortunately."

"Oh."

"So what's your story?"

"Mine?"

"Yeah. You're confused, I can tell. What's going on in your mind right now?"

"…I don't know if I'm gay or not…I've always been 'different' from other boys but…I don't know."

"Well, do you like guys?"

"That's the problem, I don't know. I'm pretty sure I don't like girls though…so that means I like guys right?"

"Not necessarily. You could be asexual. Or you could just develop a liking for girls later. Let me ask you something. What do you mean by you're different?"

"Ever since I was little, I never liked the things normal little boys liked. I always played with dolls and other girl toys. I've been caught on more than one occasion wearing things like high heels…"

"You mean you were just expressing your feminine side. There could be another word for who you are. Do you know what 'trans' means?"

"Sort of."

"Um, have you ever felt like you should've been born in a girl's body? That maybe you're not like the other boys because you shouldn't be a boy?"

"No. I've never thought that. I'm just a guy who's different."

"Okay, well then you're not really trans then…Have you ever looked at guys like straight guys look at girls?"

"No. My whole life my parents have told me that guys are supposed to act a certain way…they would just freak out more if I did that."

"You can't think about what they will like or not like. You have to do what you're comfortable with so that you can be happy. And don't worry about being more feminine than a lot of guys. Just because you don't fit into the stereotypical image of a 'normal' male doesn't mean anything. You're different? Well, good. Love the person you are, and never change for anyone. Now what I suggest to you is give boys a chance. Maybe go out with someone and see how you feel. Okay?"

"…Thank you, Hojo."

"No problem. I'm happy to help."

"Yes, you helped me quite a bit."

"I could help you more if you want. I probably know more gay boys than you do…"

"Um…"

"Think about it, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks again."

"You're so welcome." Hojo stood up and Sesshomaru followed. "Come here."

Sesshomaru listened and felt arms suddenly wrap around him. He hugged Hojo back. He found someone that did understand him and was willing to help.

Hojo walked Sesshomaru back down to his friends then left. Sesshomaru just looked at his group and said "Don't ask."

Sesshomaru had yet another sleepless night full of thought. He wasn't sure if he could take Hojo up on his offer. He wasn't sure if he was ready for a relationship, especially with another guy. He either would or he wouldn't. Simple as that.

After going back and forth on the matter for what seemed like an eternity, Sesshomaru finally came to a decision.

_I'll give guys a shot. The worse that can happen is that I find out I don't like them…_

--

A couple days later, Sesshomaru took Hojo up on his offer. He asked to talk to him alone again.

"I thought about what you said the other day," Sesshomaru informed Hojo. "And I think…I want you to help me find a boyfriend."

"I'd love to," Hojo told him. He thought for a moment. "Actually, I think I know someone who would be perfect."

"…Who?"

"My friend Jakotsu. If you want, I can take you to meet him. Don't worry, you guys can just talk and get to know each other."

"Will other people be there?"

"I'm not sure. He might just be with Koga. But everyone we hang out with is really nice."

"Oh, okay."

The two walked over to where Hojo suspected Jakotsu to be. He was only with Koga which made Sesshomaru feel relieved. He was nervous as it was, he didn't need a big group to make him feel more uncomfortable.

"Hey guys!" Hojo called with a wave.

"Hi, Hojo!" Koga said.

"Hey there, sexy!" Jakotsu shouted. As they got closer Jakotsu looked at Sesshomaru and continued. "Ooh, and who's this?"

"This is Sesshomaru," Hojo introduced. "And Sesshomaru, that's Koga and that's-"

"I'm Jakotsu," Jakotsu said with a smile.

"Hi," Sesshomaru said shyly. He looked at Jakotsu. If he would've admitted it to himself, Sesshomaru would've admitted that Jakotsu was cute. But he was still getting use to the idea of dating another guy…

"Not a big talker?"

"No…not really."

"Hojo, this guy is just too cute!"

Sesshomaru blushed at the comment. Cute? Sure, he had heard that plenty of times before but never from a guy. "Oh, uh…so are you."

Jakotsu beamed. "Well, thanks. So Sesshomaru…"

From then on Jakotsu talked to Sesshomaru about everything. Sesshomaru was surprised with himself at how much he was talking. Sure, he talked to his friends but this guy was someone he had just met. He enjoyed Jakotsu's company though. He really did seem like a sweet guy. When the bell rang, the two were in the middle of talking about shoes.

"Aw, stupid class," Jakotsu whined. "I hate to end our conversation."

"Where's your next class?" Sesshomaru asked.

"All the way at the opposite end of the school."

"Oh, mine too. We can walk down there together."

"Oh! Okay."

Sesshomaru faced Hojo and Koga. "Bye guys." He stared at Hojo. "See you around."

"Bye," Koga said.

"See ya," Hojo said smiling. _Wow, those two seemed to really hit it off._

--

"So what's your deal?" Jakotsu asked Sesshomaru.

"What do you mean?"

"I've told you about me. I'm gay, feminine, and single at the moment. What about you?"

"Oh, well…I'm kind of feminine, though you've probably figured that out. I'm single. And…I'm not really sure if I'm gay or not."

"Really? You've never been with a guy?"

"I've never been with anyone, to be honest. Male or female. But I've never had any interest in girls. And guys…well I've never thought about it."

"Oh. Maybe you should give us a chance," he joked and winked.

"I'm thinking about it."

They stopped when they reached Sesshomaru's class. Jakotsu insisted they go to his first because he didn't want a cutie like Sesshomaru getting in trouble for being late.

"Aw, looks like we're here," Jakotsu said.

"Yeah."

"I had fun with you. I hope to see you around soon."

"Yeah, same here. Usually I don't talk a lot around people I just met."

"I feel special then! Oh, and I might have a way to help you with your confusion about guys and girls."

"Really? How?"

_Oh, his innocent look is too adorable. _"Well…let's see if you're affected by this."

Before Sesshomaru even had time to say 'What?' he found his face being cupped and his lips meeting Jakotsu's. His first reaction was to _pull away! _But once Jakotsu's talented mouth started working its magic, Sesshomaru closed his eyes and stuck to his spot. After a few moments Sesshomaru started moving his lips in response. This felt like nothing he'd ever felt before, his body felt like it was on fire. The fact that he was doing this with a guy didn't even matter. They finally pulled apart for air.

Sesshomaru just had his first kiss. And it was amazing.

"Hm, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you enjoyed that."

Sesshomaru stood there staring. He didn't know what to say. Anyone with eyes could have seen that he liked that. But what did that mean? He liked being around Jakotsu and he liked kissing him…

"I think I might need a little more 'help.' I'll see you tomorrow."

Jakotsu smirked. "All right. Bye!"

--

That night, Inuyasha heard a knock on his bedroom door.

"Come in!" he yelled. He was currently playing some violent video game. Sesshomaru walked in and closed the door behind him. "Hey, Sessh."

"Hi, Inuyasha."

"Wanna play?"

"You know I do." They sat there playing while Sesshomaru shot Inuyasha's character to the ground.

"Aw, you bastard!" Inuyasha said.

"Haha, you make it too easy," Sesshomaru laughed. After awhile Sesshomaru decided to bring up the topic he had meant to. "Oh, hey Inuyasha." He shot a zombie.

"Yeah?"

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"Well, do you know Jakotsu Shichinintai?"

"Jakotsu, Jakotsu...he's Koga's friend right?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah, I know him. Why?"

"Um…" _Come on. If you can tell anyone, it's Inuyasha. _"Oh, well, that's the boy I kissed today."

Inuyasha dropped his controller out of surprise. "Whoa, what?"

_Damn, this was a bad idea…_ "Yeah, I kissed Jakotsu."

Silence. Sesshomaru's pulse started racing.

"And you liked it?"

"…Yeah. I did."

Sesshomaru's heart stopped when he saw the smile on Inuyasha's face. "Cool. You finally had your first kiss." Sesshomaru wasn't sure what to say. "Why you so quiet? You're not like that around me. Thought I'd be all freaked out about it?"

"No…" In all honesty, Sesshomaru knew Inuyasha wouldn't care. He was just prepared to hear the worst from his brother.

"Well, good. Our relationship won't change just because you like to kiss the same sex or anything like that."

"…Thanks, Inuyasha."

"Don't thank me for doing what any brother should do."

Sesshomaru went to bed that night happy. He had his first kiss, Inuyasha didn't care if it happened to be with a boy…There was no need to worry about things at the moment. They would straighten themselves out. He'd tell Rin tomorrow and then he'd go see Jakotsu again…

--

"Ooh, hey Sesshomaru," Jakotsu purred.

"Hey."

"What's up?"

"I told Rin about yesterday."

"Oh yeah? What'd she say?"

"She was completely fine with it. She asked if I was gay."

"What'd you say?"

"I told her that I didn't know…that I might be."

"Do someone need some more convincing?"

Sesshomaru smirked. "I think so."

--

Sesshomaru and Jakotsu met many more times after that. They never officially dated though. Sesshomaru eventually came to the conclusion that he had a crush on Jakotsu but it was never enough of a feeling to come out to everyone and announce he was gay. Jakotsu did, however, help him look at guys in a new light. He could at least admit when someone was cute or good looking. But no one else of any gender caught his eye in any special way.

_Maybe I'm just destined to be alone…_

He walked towards the spot where he usually met Inuyasha after school. He didn't even notice that there were other people with his brother.

"Hey, Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha said.

Sesshomaru looked up. "Oh…hi everyone."

Inuyasha was with his girlfriend Kikyo, his friends Miroku and Sango, and two girls he had never seen before.

"Hey, Sesshomaru," everyone greeted.

"Oh, hey," Inuyasha said to his brother. "These two girls are Kagura and Kanna. They're gonna walk home with us."

Sesshomaru said hello to them. Miroku and Sango separated from everyone and then they left. Sesshomaru, Inuyasha, and the rest started walking. Inuyasha was laughing with his girlfriend while Kagura talked to Kanna so Sesshomaru just stayed quiet.

"Hey," a voice said ripping him from his thoughts.

He looked over to see that it had been Kagura to disturb him. "Yes?"

"Why are you so quiet?" she asked.

"Why does it matter?"

"I'm just asking. You're as bad as my sister."

"I didn't realize being a loud mouth and never shutting up was a good thing."

She smirked. "That's not a good thing but it won't kill you to say a few sentences."

"Okay. Well I believe I just did."

"Come on, be nice Sessh."

Sesshomaru looked back and narrowed his eyes at Inuyasha. "We were merely talking. I don't need to be told how to behave, _little _brother." Inuyasha just smirked. He could hear Kagura chuckling at them, or maybe just Sesshomaru.

He turned back around. "And just what do you find so amusing?"

"Haha…you!" Kagura liked Sesshomaru. He seemed kind of cold but she could see right through that. Hell, he was probably really sweet. Sesshomaru felt a frown on his face. "Haha, hey! Are you pouting?"

"I'd never do such a thing." But still, Sesshomaru couldn't prevent the small smile that pulled at his lips. Hm, there was something he liked about this Kagura girl…perhaps he would call on her company again.

--

Sesshomaru and Kagura became fast friends. They actually had quite a bit in common yet were still different enough so that they weren't bored with each other. He still hung out with Rin and the others most days but sometimes he would visit Kagura and vise versa.

One day, Kagura walked up to Sesshomaru and his friend's with her sister Kanna.

"Hey, Sessh," she greeted.

"Hello," he said and smiled.

"You doing anything after school today?"

"No. Why?"

"Wanna come over to my house?"

"Sure."

"Okay. I'll meet you at the usual spot later then."

"Okay." Then she left. Jaken looked at Sesshomaru. "What, Jaken?"

"Uh…if you don't mind me saying, I think she likes you," Jaken mumbled.

"Ridiculous. She and I are simply friends." Besides even if she did it's not like Sesshomaru viewed her in the same way.

After school, Sesshomaru met up with Kagura after telling Inuyasha he wasn't going to walk home with him that day.

"Where's your sister?" he asked, noticing she was alone.

"She has detention," she answered.

"Really? For what?"

"She was late for class a lot."

"Oh."

"Yep. Just us, Sessh. Until we get to my house anyways."

"Who's there?"

"Just my brother."

"Which one?"

"Naraku."

"Oh."

Sesshomaru knew who Naraku was but he never actually met him. He just hoped that he wasn't some jerk or anything like that.

--

"Naraku!" Kagura called. "You here?"

"Yeah!" he yelled. "I'm in my room!"

"Okay. I brought my friend Sesshomaru so we'll be downstairs."

"Okay."

After about an hour, Sesshomaru and Kagura heard footsteps coming down the stairs. They looked up as Naraku came into the living room. Sesshomaru couldn't help but stare. He thought a lot of people were cute but Naraku was…beautiful. Never had he thought that about anyone. And it shocked him.

"Hey kids," Naraku said as he sat down.

"You're only a year older than us," Kagura said.

"So?"

"Ugh. Oh, hey Sesshomaru. This is my dumb ass brother, Naraku."

"Aw, don't make me look bad in front of your friend," Naraku laughed.

Sesshomaru smiled. "Hi, Naraku."

He smiled back. "Hello. So what are you guys up to?"

"Just talking," Kagura told him.

"About what?" Kagura looked at Sesshomaru. He had just been telling her about his and Jakotsu's 'relationship' or more like how he thought he was asexual but if he had to choose a gender it would be men. "Oh, ignore me?"

Sesshomaru studied Naraku for a second. Something told him that Naraku wouldn't be an asshole if he knew. "Guys," Sesshomaru simply stated.

"Hm? Kagura, you know by now not to leave me out of conversations like this." Sesshomaru looked at him. Was he…?

Naraku took out his phone and read the text. "Well, I'm off."

"Where are you going?" Kagura asked.

"I'm going to 'study' at Hakudoshi's."

"Ha, you know you're grounded right?"

"I should be back before Mom and Dad get home. If not…" He sat next to Kagura and flashed her the cutest smile. "Will you cover for me?"

"You know I will," she sighed.

"Thanks. See ya Kagura." He got up and turned to Sesshomaru. "Bye, Sesshomaru." He winked and started walking off.

"Yeah…bye," Sesshomaru said. _Oh boy…_

Sesshomaru didn't leave until the evening. Naraku still hadn't come home and Sesshomaru was slightly disappointed.

--

Sesshomaru and Kagura were texting that night.

'Hey, can I ask you something about Naraku?' Sesshomaru asked.

'Sure. Oh, he didn't make you uncomfortable did he?'

'No. Just wondering…is he gay?'

'Oh, because of what he said when you told him we were talking about guys? Yeah, he is.'

'Yeah. That kinda gave it away.'

'Ha, what? Got the hots for my brother?'

'No, I was just wondering!'

'Haha, okay. I'm gonna go to bed now. See you tomorrow.'

'Night.'

_I do not have the hots for Naraku._

--

As the school year's end came closer and closer some things started changing. Jakotsu and Sesshomaru's little secret meetings came to an end. They were still friends but Jakotsu wanted an official boyfriend and Sesshomaru just wasn't up for that. His parents pried a lot more. They always asked him why he didn't have a girlfriend yet, his brother did. And they would even search his closet occasionally looking for anything that 'shouldn't be in a boy's room.' His relationship with them was becoming more and more strained. One of the more positive things for him though was that he and Naraku were developing a friendship. Naraku would always hang out with him and Kagura when Sesshomaru went to their house and sometimes he would join them when they went out. Kagura didn't mind. As much as she and her brother 'fought' they were still really close.

Before Sesshomaru knew it, it was time to graduate and move on to high school. He wasn't sad to leave junior high behind. Most of his friends were going with him and he would be able to hang out with Naraku more.

--

"Wow, you're gonna be in high school," Inuyasha said. He and Sesshomaru were sitting in their front yard. It was a couple days before school was out and Sesshomaru would be finished with middle school.

"Good job at stating the obvious," Sesshomaru told him.

"Shut up. It's just weird. It feels like just yesterday we were little kids pushing each other on the swing."

"Eh, yeah."

"…You nervous?"

"No. It'll be the exact same as junior high."

"But still. New school with a lot more people. Most of them are older too."

"Well, I'm not."

"Yeah I forgot. The big bad Sesshomaru doesn't get nervous for anything."

"Damn right, Inuyasha." His little brother smiled.

"Sesshomaru!" they heard their mother yell.

"Fuck," Sesshomaru groaned then lay back in the grass.

"Guess it's time for another room check," Inuyasha mumbled.

"Fuck them." Sesshomaru didn't get up.

"Sesshomaru!"

"You realize she's gonna get mad right?" Inuyasha asked.

"…I don't care."

They heard the screen door open. Inuyasha grabbed Sesshomaru's wrist and dragged him up.

"Come on, Sesshomaru. Let's get out of here for awhile." The two brothers ran off before Izayoi had the chance to see what direction they went. She sighed and went inside. She would just have to check Sesshomaru's room once he got back.

Once they were far enough, Inuyasha and Sesshomaru stopped to catch their breath.

"Now where?" Sesshomaru asked.

"I don't know," Inuyasha panted.

"It's really hot."

"Wanna go down to the pool?"

"Sure."

When they got there, neither had swim trunks so they just took off their shirts and went in their shorts. They had fun together. They always did. Inuyasha was the only one in that house who accepted him for the way he was and he was the only one Sesshomaru was close to.

They reluctantly left. Inuyasha felt bad for his brother. It wasn't right how their parents treated Sesshomaru sometimes. They were supposed to love him no matter what…not make him feel like an outcast in his own home.

They walked through the door to their house and tried to go upstairs without attracting attention. They failed though.

"Sesshomaru," Izayoi called. "Come here."

Sesshomaru looked at Inuyasha then went to where she was. Inuyasha followed, by now he didn't need Sesshomaru to ask him anymore.

"Yes, Mom?" Sesshomaru asked without any emotion.

"I want to check your room," she told him.

"Fine."

The three of them walked up. Inuyasha couldn't help but be worried about Sesshomaru's suddenly stoic behavior.

_He was fine when we were together. Mom, Dad, you're making my brother so cold…_

Inuyasha sat next to Sesshomaru on his bed while his mom went through his stuff. The brothers said nothing but Inuyasha put his arm around Sesshomaru's shoulders. Izayoi found nothing 'odd.' Sesshomaru was smart and Inuyasha was nice. They hid anything that a 'boy shouldn't have' in Inuyasha's room since they would never suspect anything.

She then left without a word. Sesshomaru tried to pretend that the stuff their parents did didn't affect him but Inuyasha was no fool. He knew it hurt Sesshomaru every time they pulled something like this. Inuyasha wrapped both arms around his older brother and Sesshomaru rested his head on his shoulder. No words were spoken between them, no words were needed.

--

Summer vacation. Sesshomaru was hardly ever home during that time. He was always out with some friend or his brother. He enjoyed this time because once school started again he would be stuck at home for most of the week. And that was something he was beginning to hate.

When school started up, he and Rin walked together. Even though friends changed during junior high, the two still remained best friends. They both had others who came close but there could never be a replacement for Rin and there could never be a replacement for Sesshomaru.

On the first day, Naraku came up to Sesshomaru and sat with him. They talked during all of lunch and were almost late to class.

Sesshomaru started seeing Naraku more and more, without Kagura being there. He still talked to her too but just at different times.

"Hey, Sesshomaru," Naraku said one day. "Let me walk you home today."

"Um…okay. I just got to tell the others not to wait for me," he told him.

"Okay. I'll meet you in front of your last class."

Sesshomaru liked talking and being around Naraku. A lot. He was glad that they were friends. There was this feeling inside of him when he thought of him…he never felt like this for anyone except for one person. But it was stronger this time. He knew exactly what this meant.

His last two classes went by quickly. He walked out and was greeted by Naraku.

"Hey, Sessh," Naraku smiled.

"Hi, Naraku."

They walked slowly to Sesshomaru's house and talked without interruption. When they reached their destination, Sesshomaru almost didn't want to leave. Almost? Hell, he did not want his friend to go.

"I guess I have to leave you here," Naraku sighed.

"Yeah…I'll see you tomorrow," Sesshomaru told him.

"Promise?"

"I swear."

He smiled. "I guess it's okay then."

Sesshomaru smiled too. Naraku then leaned towards him for his hug. Sesshomaru happily wrapped his arms around the other guy.

"Sesshomaru," he whispered still holding the younger. "Can I tell you something?"

"Of course." This piqued his curiosity.

"I'm really glad that my insane sister met you. Otherwise I never would've known you."

Naraku pulled back so he could see the others face.

"Me too."

They locked eyes. After being mesmerized by the other Naraku's face moved closer to Sesshomaru's. He knew what was going to happen so he just closed his eyes. Naraku's lips captured his own in a gentle kiss. Soon Sesshomaru was hungry for more and the other seemed to read his mind. Naraku brushed his tongue against his bottom lip and Sesshomaru let him explore. He became lost in this kiss and only when they pulled away for air did he come back to reality.

"Naraku…"

"Sesshomaru, I know you've never gone out with anybody…" He whispered in his ear. "What if I were the one to change that?" He placed one quick kiss on his lips then left.

_Did he just…he just asked me to be his boyfriend…_

Sesshomaru walked inside his house surprised. But it was in a good way. He went to his room after noticing he was home alone. Good, he needed peace and quiet to think this one out.

_Am I ready to do this? _Being Naraku's boyfriend would mean he would have to come out to his friends and his brother. Would he also have to tell his parents? _How long can I keep it a secret? _But it was Naraku here. _I…I do like him. _He felt like this only somewhat with Jakotsu but with Naraku it was so much more. He closed his eyes and pictured himself with the black-haired boy. It wasn't that difficult. Sesshomaru knew deep down what he truly wanted. He exhaled. _Tomorrow I'll tell Naraku…I'll tell him that I want to be his boyfriend._

--

"Are you sure you want this?" Naraku asked Sesshomaru. He had just told Naraku the decision he had made last night.

"Yes," he answered. "I want to be with you." To prove it, he kissed Naraku.

When they pulled away Naraku said, "You know that you're going to have to come out, right?"

"Yes. I'll do it."

Naraku walked him to his class. Sesshomaru was somewhat nervous to tell his friends but he knew they'd accept him. The same for his brother too. He'd tell Rin and Kagura first. Hell, if he was going to date her brother she should know.

At lunch, Sesshomaru took Rin off alone. All he said is that they needed to talk.

"What is it, Sesshomaru?" she asked.

"Um, well…you know Naraku…" he muttered. This was harder than he thought. Even if she was his best friend.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Yesterday, when he walked me home…he asked me something and I think I should tell you."

She put a hand on his shoulder. She had a clue as to what he was trying to say. "It's okay. You know you can tell me anything."

"…Naraku is my boyfriend. I'm, hell, I'm gay."

She hugged him. She knew how hard that must've been for him. "I hope things work out with him."

"Thanks, Rin."

They walked back to where everyone else was, Sesshomaru feeling happy.

"Who else have you told?" Rin asked.

"Just you," Sesshomaru replied. "I'm going to tell Kagura next though. It is her brother."

"I'm sure she'll be okay with it as will all your friends."

"Yeah, yeah you're right."

--

Kagura, Naraku, and Sesshomaru were walking to the first two's house after school. It was Friday and Sesshomaru was going to spend the night over there. All of their siblings would be there so it would probably be interesting…

"Kagura," Sesshomaru suddenly said. He was just going to say it quickly. "There's something Naraku and I have to tell you."

"Um, okay," she said. "Shoot."

"Well, first things first. I've recently discovered that I'm gay."

"Really? Nice but what does that have to do with…" Her eyes went from Sesshomaru to Naraku back to Sesshomaru. "You two are going out?!"

"Yes, sister," Naraku told her, a grin on his face. "Indeed, we are."

"Lovely…neither of you better fuck with the other."

"Then what will we do tonight when we're alone in my bedroom?" Naraku asked.

Sesshomaru blushed slightly but wrapped an arm around his new boyfriend and chuckled.

Kagura was trying to hold back a smile in order to look mad. "You're hopeless!" She was failing though and she knew it. She and Naraku settled for a glaring contest.

"So…you're fine right?" Sesshomaru asked.

Kagura turned and her glare was replaced with a smile. "Of course, Sessh."

_So far so good…_Sesshomaru thought.

--

It was three in the morning. Naraku and Kagura's parents got mad for all them being so loud so everyone went to bed. Sesshomaru went with Naraku to his room happy to have some alone time. They were currently on Naraku's bed with Sesshomaru snuggling against Naraku. It was easy for Sesshomaru to be close and open with Naraku. They had been friends for awhile now but he hoped things would only get better now that they were dating.

This was Sesshomaru's first real relationship. The last thing he needed was for it to go badly.

"Hey, Naraku?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Hm?"

"How did your parents react when they found out you were gay?"

Naraku looked at his boyfriend. "They were fine about it. Are you worried about what your parents will say?"

"Yeah…they've never liked how I've acted. I don't know what they will think…"

"You can't hide this forever…You don't have to tell them now but do you really want to live in secret?"

"No. I should probably just tell them and get it over with."

"Don't feel like you have to rush. You have plenty of time."

"You're right…" Sesshomaru reached up and kissed Naraku. Afterwards Sesshomaru drifted to sleep.

--

The next few months of Sesshomaru's life were amazing. Never did he ever imagine that having a boyfriend would make him so happy. School gossip spread quickly so a lot of people knew that 'the kid who acted like a girl' was gay and had a boyfriend. Not too many people messed with Sesshomaru though on a count of whom he was dating. Naraku would kick anyone's ass who dared to make fun of Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru could defend himself but no one took a freshman seriously.

Sesshomaru felt guilty though. He had yet to tell his own brother that he was gay and had a boyfriend. He wasn't sure why. Was it because he was afraid that if he told him their parents would somehow find out? Or would Inuyasha not like his choice in boyfriends? Or maybe he was afraid that he wouldn't accept him. Even if Inuyasha told him more than a year ago that he didn't care who he kissed or anything…dating was so much more. He couldn't bear to lose his brother, the person whom he had always loved more than anything.

He deserved to know though. Inuyasha had always been honest with him and they swore they would always be there for one another.

Sesshomaru and Inuyasha walked home together one day when they were well into the second semester of school. Sesshomaru was nervous as hell because earlier that day he had made a decision. He was going to sit his parents and Inuyasha down that night and tell them he was gay. Inuyasha deserved to know and he was sick of keeping secrets. Sometimes people could be surprising. Maybe his parents would be okay with it. He knew better than to get his hopes up too much though. He figured that if they didn't things wouldn't get much worse from what they were now.

As soon as they stepped through the door of their house, Sesshomaru went upstairs. Inuyasha watched him as he left and thought it kind of weird but he didn't think too much of it. He went to the living room and greeted their mom.

Sesshomaru stayed up in his room for a few hours. He just lay on his bed listening to music the entire time. It always had a way of calming him. Once he was sure both of his parents were home he slowly got up and left his room.

When he went downstairs all three of the people he wanted to talk to were there. Inuyasha looked at his brother and immediately saw that something was off.

"Sesshomaru? Are you okay?" Inuyasha asked. That caused Inutaisho and Izayoi to look at him.

"Yeah," Sesshomaru murmured. "Actually…can you three sit down? I need to tell you something."

Inuyasha quickly took a seat next to his brother who was standing. Their parents did the same.

"What is it, Sesshomaru?" Inutaisho asked. "You didn't get in trouble or something, did you?"

"No…nothing like that. This is going to be really hard to say so just bear with me." Inuyasha stared at his brother. He could tell he wasn't okay. He looked like he was about to have a panic attack. "I…for the last few months…damn it."

"It's okay, Sesshomaru," Inuyasha said soothingly. "Take your time."

Sesshomaru smiled slightly at his brother before continuing. "Well, I found something out about myself a few months ago." He was speaking so softly. "And since discovering it I've been really happy…I think you guys should know so that's why I'm telling you that…" He looked at his brother then stared straight at his parents. "I'm gay."

Inuyasha turned to look at his parents. Their shock was apparent. In a flash, he got up and hugged his older brother tightly. Sesshomaru saw the same look on their parents' faces and he knew what was going to happen. He gripped his little brother just as tightly.

"I love you, Sesshomaru," Inuyasha whispered.

"I love you too."

They pulled away when their mother spoke. "Inuyasha, go to your room. We need to speak to Sesshomaru alone."

He went up without a word, just a glance at Sesshomaru. Once he was gone, Izayoi spoke again.

"Sit down, Sesshomaru." He listened. He was regretting ever saying a word.

"What did we ever do to you?" Inutaisho asked. Sesshomaru was surprised at that and didn't know how to answer. "We've raised you, given you a good life, so why? Why are you doing this?"

"W-what are you talking about?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Don't cause us problems. You're not gay, you just want attention."

Sesshomaru immediately became angry. Angry and hurt. "I'm not?! I suppose the boy I'm dating is nothing then?! How dare you tell me what I am or am not!"

"Watch your damn mouth! Who is this boy? When I find out, you're forbidden to see him!"

"Go to hell! You can't stop me from seeing my boyfriend!"

"Stop saying that. You're not gay, damn it!"

"You guys are supposed to love me for who I am."

"We do love you," Izayoi stepped in. "You just need help."

"What? Help?!"

"Obviously something's wrong with you if you feel the need to act this way," Inutaisho said. Sesshomaru couldn't take this. This was absolutely absurd. Yes, definitely a mistake to ever say anything. "Sesshomaru, grow out of this phase already and start acting normal."

That was the final straw. "Fuck you guys!!" Sesshomaru screamed. Inutaisho slapped him square across the face.

Sesshomaru looked at his dad wide-eyed. He held his cheek, completely shocked at what he did.

"Go upstairs," Inutaisho said through gritted teeth.

He glared at both his parents before running to his bedroom. He had been too upset to notice that as he climbed the stairs Inuyasha had gotten up and ran to his own room after listening to everything…

Sesshomaru slammed his door shut as hard as he could before collapsing onto his bed.

"Fuck!" he screamed into a pillow so it was muffled. "Damn it!" He kicked at the wall his bed was next to nearly putting a hole in it.

Inuyasha heard his brother. He felt awful for him and couldn't believe their parents. He couldn't imagine what he was going through right now…Sesshomaru needed someone so Inuyasha stood up and went to his brother's room.

"Go away!" Sesshomaru yelled thinking it was his parents who had just walked in.

"It's me, Sessh," Inuyasha said quietly. Sesshomaru sat up but didn't look at him. Inuyasha made his way over and sat next to his brother.

"I hate them, Inuyasha!" Then Sesshomaru flung his arms around Inuyasha.

Sesshomaru was more hurt than anything. First with what his parents said then with that slap…he felt his eyes start to burn. He didn't care anymore and he let the tears flow. Inuyasha stroked his hair.

"It's okay, it's okay," he whispered. "You'll get through this and everything will be fine."

Inuyasha held him tighter as his silent crying turned into shaky sobbing. Sesshomaru buried his face in Inuyasha's chest as the tears kept coming.

"How could I have been so stupid?" Sesshomaru cried.

"You're not stupid. Those people downstairs are."

"Is something wrong with me? Am I not normal?"

"Nothing's wrong with you," Inuyasha assured him. "Don't let what they say get to you. You're a sweet and decent person and if they think otherwise then they're the ones with something wrong."

Sesshomaru still cried for awhile longer. Eventually he ran out of tears to shed even though the pain didn't go away. He continued clinging to his brother. Inuyasha still held him close.

"Inuyasha…"

"What is it?"

"Thank you…for everything. For accepting me, for being here with me…"

"Don't thank me for doing what any brother should do." Sesshomaru smiled slightly remembering what his brother said to him what seemed like an eternity ago. "It's getting late now. Try to get some sleep."

"You sound like the older one here."

"Even if I am younger I'll still look out for you and make sure you're okay."

Sesshomaru felt comforted by his words and while still holding Inuyasha, he fell asleep.

Inuyasha looked down at his brother. The conversation between him and his parents he had eavesdropped on buzzed through his mind. _How can people be so cruel to their own child like that? _It didn't make sense to him and he didn't know why they did that. All he did know was that he hated his parents right now. His eyelids eventually started feeling heavy so with one last look at his brother he drifted off to sleep.

--

Inuyasha got up the next morning before Sesshomaru did. Inuyasha thought about what to do.

_Should I wake him up for school? Would he even be up for going? _Inuyasha carefully got up so as not to wake his still sleeping brother. _Well, maybe he'd like to see his boyfriend…who is that guy anyways?_

Inuyasha looked out the window. Both his parents' cars were gone, both of them would be home in the evening. He walked back to his brother and gently shook him.

"Sesshomaru," he whispered. "Sesshomaru, get up."

His older brother swatted his hand away and rolled away from him. "No…" he mumbled.

"Come, on. Don't be an ass." Seeing as how this wasn't going anywhere, Inuyasha grabbed his brother and pulled him up.

"I'm up! I'm up!" Sesshomaru rubbed his eyes and yawned.

"Yeah, finally…so, what do you think you're going to do today?"

"What do you mean?"

"Are you going to school? Because Mom and Dad aren't home, not gonna be home until later."

Sesshomaru thought about it. He wasn't in the mood to do any schoolwork. He wouldn't be able to concentrate at all. And if someone tried to fuck with him…he'd probably snap and kill them. He sighed. _I want to see Naraku though…_

"I'm going to skip school today."

"Oh, okay."

"Are you?"

"Well…if you want me to. I mean, if you want to be by yourself then I understand…"

"Being alone with my thoughts is the last thing I need right now…"

"I'll stay with you."

"Hey…do you want to meet my boyfriend?"

Hell yeah, Inuyasha wanted to meet him. He had no clue who this guy was.

"Sure."

"You might be surprised…I'll call him and tell him to come over later."

"Okay."

Sesshomaru called him. "Sesshomaru?" Naraku answered. "What's up, sexy?"

"Hey. I'm not going to school today…"

"Why not? Are you okay?"

"I'll tell you later. I actually wanted to ask you something. Do you want to come over later?"

"Uh, yeah. But what about your parents?"

"They're not here. Only my brother."

"Does Inuyasha know about us?"

"No. I want you to meet him."

"What time should I come over?"

"Around eleven."

"Okay, see you then."

"Bye."

"Well," Sesshomaru told Inuyasha. "He's coming later. Now if you don't mind, I'm going back to sleep."

Inuyasha yawned. "Yeah, me too." He started walking to the door.

"Er, Inuyasha…"

He turned around to look at his brother. He knew what he was going to say. "No problem, Sesshomaru. I'll be here for you, always."

Sesshomaru smiled. Then he lay back down on his bed and Inuyasha went to his own room.

After a long time of thinking about the previous day, Sesshomaru was finally able to force himself to sleep. At least when he was asleep he wouldn't have to think about anything.

--

"Sesshomaru!"

Sesshomaru groaned at the person yelling. _Go away._

"Sesshomaru! Wake up!" Then the person walked next to him. "Fine, when your boyfriend comes I'll just tell him to go home."

_Oh yeah…Naraku…Wait. What time is it?! _Sesshomaru sat up quickly and glanced at his clock. Good, it was only ten.

"If you weren't such a lazy ass I wouldn't have to yell at you to get up," Inuyasha told him.

"Yeah, good morning to you too," Sesshomaru grumbled.

"Now go get ready. You always take forever anyways."

Sesshomaru glared at him but got up anyways, grabbed some clothes, and went to go take a shower.

--

"Someone's at the door," Inuyasha told his brother. They were both sitting downstairs while Sesshomaru was kicking Inuyasha's ass at Mario Kart.

"Thanks for stating the obvious," Sesshomaru said dryly. He got up. "It's probably him."

He walked to the other room and opened the door. "Hey, Naraku."

"Hm, hey," Naraku smiled.

"Come here." Sesshomaru pulled him in for a deep kiss, it wasn't as if Inuyasha could see them.

"Hey!" Inuyasha shouted. "What the hell is taking so long?"

"He's impatient," Naraku chuckled.

"You have no idea." He started dragging him to the living room. "Inuyasha, I'm sure you already know my boyfriend."

"Naraku?!" Inuyasha exclaimed. "You're going out with Kagura's brother?" Sesshomaru smiled at Inuyasha's goofy behavior.

"Damn right," Naraku said.

"Uh…cool?" _Wow…Kagura's brother?! _It wasn't like Inuyasha had a problem with the guy. He just never suspected his brother to be dating his friend's brother, someone who he actually knew.

"You're silly sometimes, you know that?" Sesshomaru teased.

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes. "Whatever," he grumbled.

The three spent time together until around three. That's when Inuyasha said he was going to see his friends for a little bit. Sesshomaru had yet to tell Naraku about yesterday so he decided now would be perfect while they were alone.

"I need to tell you something, Naraku," Sesshomaru said. "Let's go to my room though."

"Oh…okay," he responded.

Sesshomaru continued once he closed his bedroom door. "I-I told them last night."

It took a minute to figure out what he was talking about, but when Naraku did his eyes widened. "You told your parents you were gay?"

"Yeah…and Inuyasha. You saw that Inuyasha is okay with it, with us. But my parents, they said I need help and that something's wrong with me and that I'm just doing this for attention…" Sesshomaru had an extreme urge to cry right now and it was taking all his willpower not to break down. He thought he had shed all his tears with Inuyasha and he didn't want to do it again.

"Sesshomaru…I'm so sorry to hear that…" He got up and hugged him.

"I shouldn't have told them…I should've known." Naraku took Sesshomaru to his bed and laid him down. Now was not the time for words. What was there to say anyways? Naraku lay next to him and held him in his warm embrace. Sesshomaru felt like a fool for telling his parents but there was nothing he could do now…except wait. He would have to wait to see what 'help' his parents would get him. That thought made him shiver and he moved closer to his boyfriend.

Naraku noticed the small shift. He tilted his chin up and kissed him gently with all his love poured into it. He showed Sesshomaru with his gesture that even if his parents didn't accept him, he was still loved.

"I love you, Naraku."

"I love you too, Sesshomaru…things will be okay."

Sesshomaru and Naraku just lay there together for a long time. Sesshomaru felt better wrapped in a pair of strong arms.

Naraku then felt something vibrating against his thigh. "Um, Sesshomaru?"

He sighed. "My phone…" He pulled it out of his pocket and answered. "What's up, Inuyasha?"

Naraku was so close to Sesshomaru and Inuyasha was talking loud so he could hear the whole conversation.

"I just saw Mom's car past by! I'm almost home so she should be there too any minute. Get Naraku out of there!" Inuyasha told him frantically.

"Fuck!" Sesshomaru cursed. He got up and started dragging Naraku. "Okay, thanks for telling me. Bye."

"That's great," Naraku muttered.

"Yeah, I know," Sesshomaru sighed. He was about to leave out the front door when he saw his mom's car pull up in the driveway. "Damn it! Come on."

They ran back upstairs and hid in his room. "What are we waiting for?" Naraku asked.

"Until she comes in and goes into her room to change or something. Then we'll sneak out."

"Okay."

Sesshomaru sat next to the door with his ear pressed against it listening. He heard the door open, and the footsteps coming up the stairs, but then…

"Hide!" Sesshomaru whispered and pushed Naraku. He shoved him in the closet seeing as that was pretty much the only good place to hide. Naraku fell to the floor with Sesshomaru right on top of him. "Be quiet."

Then Naraku heard the door open. His mother seemed to come in just for a minute before she left again.

"What was that about?" Naraku asked.

"She's probably wondering why Inuyasha and I aren't home," Sesshomaru whispered.

"Oh. Well, as lovely as this position is, perhaps we should get going."

"Oh…yeah, we should."

They got up then quickly and quietly snuck out of the house. They took off and when Sesshomaru went back home, it wasn't until the evening. He went upstairs without a word to his parents and went straight to Inuyasha.

"Finally," Inuyasha said when he saw his brother. "I had to cover for your ass."

"Happy to see you too. What did you tell them?"

"That you went to Kagura's after school and that your phone died so you asked me to tell them."

"Thanks."

"Have fun with Naraku?"

"Yes, actually I did."

"Good…um, Sessh?"

Sesshomaru knew that look on his face. That meant Inuyasha had some bad news. "What is it?"

"I heard those two talking when I came home…I think they're planning to do something with you tomorrow."

Sesshomaru panicked on the inside. "Do something? Like what?"

"I-I'm not sure. I tried to listen, I really did, but they weren't clear. They just said stuff like 'oh, tomorrow we have to take Sesshomaru.' Y'know?" Inuyasha was upset that he couldn't find out exactly what they were going to do. "Sorry…"

"Don't apologize. It's okay, I'm glad you found out they were doing anything at all…" _What are they planning? 'Help, help…' What does that mean?!_

For the rest of the evening and most of the night Sesshomaru thought about what was going to happen to him. It honestly freaked him out. Who knew what the hell they were going to do? Around three in the morning Sesshomaru finally drifted to sleep. _I still have school in the morning…_

He woke up that morning, got ready, and went downstairs. Both his parents were there, it seemed like they were waiting for him.

"You're not going to school," Izayoi announced.

"Why not?" Sesshomaru asked. He was dreading the answer.

"We're going to take you somewhere," Inutaisho said.

"Where?"

"A therapist. They'll see why you are acting like you are."

Sesshomaru turned raging mad. "What the fuck is wrong with you?!" he screamed.

"We're just trying to find out what's wrong with you." He hated the fact that his father was speaking so calmly and he himself sounded like a fucking lunatic. He couldn't help it though.

"There is nothing wrong with me! Why can't you just accept the fact that I like guys!"

"Because it isn't right!" Izayoi yelled. "Guys like girls, not their same gender!"

"I'm not going."

"Yes, you are. There's no arguing it. We're leaving soon."

"Like hell I am." Before they had a chance to say anything else, Sesshomaru stomped upstairs. He just needed to be alone. He passed Inuyasha but his little brother didn't say anything. He understood his need to be by himself so he just went downstairs without speaking to his parents and left for school.

--

Oh, Sesshomaru heard them. He heard their calls for him to go down so they could leave. Well, fuck them. Both of his parents could fuck right off if they thought he would willingly go with them to wherever the hell they were taking him. He had locked himself in his room for the last hour.

"Sesshomaru!" Inutaisho called sternly.

_Fuck you._

Then footsteps stomped up the stairs.

_Both of you can go to hell._

Then his door lock was being messed with and being forced open. "Let's go. Now, Sesshomaru!"

_Damn it all…_

--

Sesshomaru was dead silent after being dragged into the car. He was seething on the inside but there was no point in voicing his anger now. It wasn't like his parents would listen to him anyways. They parked and he almost decided to stay in the car. But then he thought about his parents yelling at him and dragging him in that building like some kind of nutter so he got out.

They sat in the waiting room. Sesshomaru didn't know what to expect. Were they going to try and brainwash him? Convince him that he really was straight? Would they diagnose him as mental? His name was called by some skinny bald man. He went in alone with this stranger, immediately hating him. How dare he about to try and change Sesshomaru. He was led to a room where he sat down. Sesshomaru didn't want to talk to this guy but of course he wouldn't be left alone. Hell, the point of these things was to talk right? Yeah, whatever…

"So, Sesshomaru," the man started. "I understand your parents sort of…made you come, correct?" Silence. "They wanted me to talk to you about something you told them about recently and to find out why you're acting the way you are."

_Don't get mad. Don't get mad. Don't get mad._

"So first things first," he continued. "What's this about you saying you're gay?" No answer. "Sesshomaru, we can't make progress if you don't contribute to this discussion."

"There's nothing to make progress about!" Sesshomaru suddenly hissed. "I'm gay, that's it. End of discussion!" _Damn it! _So much for not talking.

The guy remained calm. "Tell me, why to you feel the need to say such things?"

"What?"

"That you are gay. Why?"

"Uh, well I think it's because I like guys!"

"Do you really now? Maybe you saying you are indeed gay is just a way to get attention from your parents. Have you ever felt…like maybe they don't pay enough attention to you?"

Okay, now what the fuck was going on? Was this guy serious? Just where the hell did his parents bring him anyways? Sesshomaru was pissed. First because of his parents (which just made him raging mad) and now this guy was spitting out absurdities. He suddenly thought of his brother and Inuyasha's vulgar mouth then had the strange urge to copy his behavior. "No, I'm pretty sure the reason I say I'm gay is because I like to fuck my _boy_friend." Oh yes…this was going to be a long day indeed.

--

Sesshomaru's parents briefly spoke to the man who had talked with Sesshomaru before they drove back home. Sesshomaru hated what just happened. It felt like he was being brainwashed into thinking he was straight, that the reason he 'pretended' to be gay was because he felt neglected by his parents and was seeking attention. He knew his parents were never the most loving towards him but for that man to even suggest something like that was just…ugh! He was gay because he liked the same sex damn it! And it would only be a matter of time before his 'abnormal behavior,' as his wonderful parents put it, was questioned. Then attempts would be made to have it 'fixed.' Sesshomaru couldn't help but scoff at that idea. As if they could ever change who he was…and who were they to deem what was right and wrong? Why should he have to fit into any gender stereotypes? He was his own person, and he'd be damned to hell first before he changed for anyone…

Too bad that he'd have to go to these sessions every two weeks for kami knew how long…

--

Sesshomaru refused to talk about the sessions to anyone, not even Inuyasha or Naraku, for a couple months. It made him angry and hurt to even think about them. After the first one, he refused to talk to his parents. He'd ignore them at home. But then his therapist suggested that they join in these talks too. That was a horrible idea. Those talks turned into fights with his parents. From then on Sesshomaru went out a lot more. He was rarely home anymore. Even Inuyasha noticed.

"Hey Sessh," Inuyasha said. They were at the mall one Saturday night because Sesshomaru did not want to be home. "How come you're never home anymore?"

"I don't wish to be around our parents," he answered quietly.

"You never have…but you've been gone more than ever now."

"Well wouldn't you? If you're parents didn't love you, wouldn't you be away from them too?" Sesshomaru's tone wasn't angry. He continued to speak in that quiet voice.

Inuyasha knew he couldn't blame his brother. He would do the same thing. Still, he worried for his brother a bit. He acted like he was fine but Inuyasha knew his brother was hurting. He could see it in his eyes every time he came home from those therapy sessions. Just what kind of fucked up therapy was it anyways? Sesshomaru never told him…he asked but he never said a word…

"Sesshomaru?"

"Huh?" he grunted.

"You were zoned out."

"Oh, just thinking."

"Oh."

Well, even if Sesshomaru wouldn't tell him the details, Inuyasha knew that their parents were causing a lot more harm than good and it pained Sesshomaru.

--

"No! I will _not_ do that!" Sesshomaru screamed at his parents. They were in another session. The therapist had suggested they try a new approach to this whole let's-brainwash-this-kid-into-thinking-he's-straight thing and his parents were ordering him to go along with it.

"Yes, you will!" Inutaisho growled. "You will break up with your boyfriend!"

"I refuse. And there's not a damn thing you can do about it! You don't even know who he is!"

True, they didn't know for one hundred percent that he was Naraku. They had an idea though. He went to Naraku's (though he made sure to say Kagura's around them) house a lot. Then when he was out with Naraku his parents would happen to drive by and see that he was with Naraku. It wasn't enough to prove anything but they were catching on. Plus, talk around school had a funny way of making its way to parents.

"We know you're going out with Kagura's brother," Izayoi stated with a lot of confidence.

"Ha, I'll let you believe whatever insane delusion you guys want, makes it easier for me to go out with my boyfriend."

"We're not dumb, Sesshomaru," Inutaisho said. "We want you to break up with that boy."

They could fuck off before that happened. "I'm not going to listen to this." Then Sesshomaru proceeded to get up.

"And just where the hell do you think you're going?"

"I'm leaving!"

Then he ran out of the room and down the halls before anyone could stop him. He wasn't going to be told that he had to break up with the one person who truly understood him. He wasn't going to give him up for anything.

He knew he must've looked crazy as he sprinted out of the building but he couldn't take it. He felt like he was going to explode. He had never been unhappier than during these months of going to 'therapy.' Now it was just too much. He ran to the nearest bus stop and took a bus down to Naraku's. He didn't even bother calling. He just knocked on the front door unannounced but he knew neither he nor his family would mind the intrusion.

"Sesshomaru? What are you doing here?" Naraku asked when he answered.

"I had to get away," Sesshomaru replied. Naraku took him up to his room before he continued his questioning.

"What happened?" Naraku knew today was Sesshomaru's therapy but the white-haired male never talked about the meetings. But something looked so wrong in Sesshomaru's eyes.

"They want me to break up with you."

"What?"

"The therapist suggested it and of course they were all for it. I'll never listen to them though but I know…they're going to make my life hell for it." Naraku wrapped his arms around Sesshomaru and held him in his strong arms. "It's just…I don't know how much longer I can do this. This therapy is draining me." Sesshomaru was quiet after that and Naraku thought it best for him to remain the same. After awhile Sesshomaru muttered something else. "I absolutely hate my parents. I can't even stand to be home anymore, we just fight now. They won't accept me, why won't they accept me?!"

Naraku then felt wetness on his arms and he realized his boyfriend was crying. He never did that. He looked at Sesshomaru's face, the tears falling down. He looked so fragile right now. His parents were really making him miserable. If they continued like this…they would drive him mad…

"I'm sorry, it's hard. Once you're old enough though you won't have to deal with them at all. They're fools."

"I'm not going to those sessions anymore…I won't. Not if this is what's going to happen every time now…"

"Good. You don't need them. There's nothing wrong with you." He stroked the younger one's hair. Sesshomaru pushed him down gently onto his bed and lay with him. He snuggled closer to him so Naraku rubbed his neck in a comforting gesture.

"I love you, Naraku."

"I love you too. I'll always be here for you."

"I don't even want to think about what's going on with them. As long as I have you though I know I can get through this." Sesshomaru then decided to press his lips to his boyfriend's. He needed someone to love him right now and he knew Naraku was more than capable of doing it.

Naraku pressed back. He left Sesshomaru wanting more and the younger one started grabbing at his clothes. He took off his own shirt, then Sesshomaru's to reveal his chest. Naraku kissed and nipped at his neck as Sesshomaru's hand went to his pants. There he tugged at them until Naraku kicked them off.

"Sesshomaru," he breathed.

"Hm?"

"…Are you sure you want this?"

Their eyes met. "Yes."

As more clothes came off Sesshomaru felt kind of nervous. This was his first time but he was ready right? Soon he found his legs spread with Naraku between them.

"This is going to hurt at first," he whispered.

"Okay," Sesshomaru said as his eyes slid shut. The pain of being entered was nothing Sesshomaru was prepared for. It hurt. Wasn't this supposed to feel good?

"Are you okay?" Naraku asked.

"Yeah, keep going."

As his boyfriend kept moving inside of him, Sesshomaru started seeing why people enjoyed this so much. Soon he was hitting a spot inside of him that made him cry out every time. His loud moans and cries filled the room. After their bodies rocked together in the most pleasurable way, Sesshomaru found himself arching his back and yelling Naraku's name as he came. Naraku soon followed. He pulled out of him and brought his panting love close. He held him close not wanting to think about when he would have to go home.

--

Sesshomaru's eyes opened. It took him a moment but then he remembered where he was and why he was naked with Naraku. They must've fallen asleep. Even if today had started out horribly…Sesshomaru felt a sort of happy feeling inside of him. Being with Naraku made him feel better, if only for this short time. Naraku truly cared for him and that was enough. He didn't need his parents…and he'd keep telling himself that until he believed it completely.

_What time is it? _He knew he should probably go home but he found himself not wanting to. Well, he never wanted to but really he found himself not caring if his parents were mad at him. He didn't want to go home tonight so he wouldn't. He got up carefully so as not to disturb Naraku and got his phone. He called Inuyasha.

"Hey Sessh," Inuyasha answered. "Where have you been?"

"You're alone, right?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Yep."

"I'm at Naraku's. I've been here since that _delightful_ session today. Did they tell you what happened?"

"They said you just up and left. That's it."

"I left because…because that fucking bastard thought it'd be a good idea if I broke up with Naraku!"

_That's the first time he's ever told me anything about those sessions. _"What the fuck? That's a horrible idea!"

"That's why I left." He sighed. "Inuyasha, are you at home?"

"Yeah but I'm going to leave soon."

"Before you go can you tell them that I'm spending the night at…Kagura's?"

"Yeah, I will."

"Thanks…"

"No problem, Sessh."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, bye."

After they hung up, Sessh crawled back next to Naraku. The warmth was comforting.

"Was that your brother?" Naraku mumbled having just woken up.

"Yeah," Sesshomaru whispered. "Is it okay if I stay here tonight?"

"Yes. You know you don't have to ask."

"I love you."

"I love you too, Sesshomaru."

Naraku took care of Sesshomaru for the rest of the night. As much as Sesshomaru tried to deny it, his parents' actions hurt him. Naraku could see that clearly. The next day, the two of them went out alone. Naraku thought it would be better if they weren't in a big group. Sesshomaru did seem to cheer up a bit. That is, until it was the evening and Sesshomaru had to go home. He couldn't sleep out tonight since there was school the next morning. He told his boyfriend goodbye before he went back home.

He tried to sneak directly upstairs but his parents caught him quickly. It was like they were waiting for him…probably were.

"Sesshomaru, sit down," Inutaisho ordered. He reluctantly listened. "We don't like what you did yesterday. Now we've thought about it and until you break up with your boyfriend you're grounded."

"I'm not leaving him!" Sesshomaru snapped.

"Then you're not leaving this house," Izayoi told him.

"And you don't think that's messed up at all?"

"What's messed up? Us trying to help you?"

"How is destroying my relationship helping?!"

"Because you're not gay. You shouldn't be with a boy."

"Why not?"

"Because it isn't right," Inutaisho said. "You're acting out."

"No I'm not! What, do you think I'm kidding when I say I'm gay? If you do, then here's something for you. I am dead serious when I say I do not like girls and that I like guys!

"If that's the case…then there is something wrong with you. And it needs to be fixed."

Sesshomaru nearly choked on his next words. Nothing was wrong with him… "There is nothing that you need to fix. Why can't you just accept that this is the way I am…?"

"No son of ours will be like this."

Sesshomaru stood up. He couldn't take this. He ran up to his room without another word and locked the door. He was so angry and hurt. _No! I shouldn't care what they think. _He remembered what he thought at Naraku's. He should be thinking that- he didn't need the two people downstairs who claimed to be his parents. But…he just couldn't bring himself to believe it, as much as he wanted to…he couldn't.

Inuyasha heard the fighting downstairs a few minutes ago followed by his brother going into his room. How long was all this going to last? Their parents had to accept him eventually right? But Inuyasha couldn't help but think that maybe when they did it would be a little too late.

He left his room and knocked on his brother's door. Hopefully he'd be able to comfort him at least a little. But he received no answer. He knocked again.

"Sessh?" he called. Nothing. "Sesshomaru?" Still nothing. _Why won't he answer?_

"…I'm fine, Inuyasha," came the weak reply.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah…"

"O-okay then."

He went back to his room. That was odd…his brother would always open the door for him. _I guess he just needs to be alone right now._

--

That was the first of many pointless arguments between Sesshomaru and his parents. He eventually just started leaving the house again. Then his parents would yell at him not to until he broke up with his boyfriend. Then he'd be in trouble again. It worked in a cycle. They would fight almost always. They would tell him he was sick and he would tell them they were ignorant. They stopped the therapy for a short time but as quickly as they did away with it, they brought it back. His dad had to practically drag him to those sessions every time. With every fight and every session, Sesshomaru felt a small part of himself shrivel into nothing. His parents' words constantly gnawed at him even though he tried to tell himself the same old things. _I don't need my parents. _The same old lies.

--

It was summer now. But instead of escaping his house and spending the whole time out, Sesshomaru was forced to stay in his room. His parents had found out that he was going out with Naraku and they were not going to let that continue. Sesshomaru mentally kicked himself for being so stupid, it was his fault they found out. He was talking to Naraku one night. He didn't know his parents were at the door listening and had told his boyfriend 'I love you.' Then they ended up talking to Naraku's parents and found out the two boys were dating. Now they definitely weren't going to let up on their punishment.

Inuyasha noticed that his brother was withdrawing from him a bit. They always used to talk to each other about personal things but for months they hadn't really. Sesshomaru hadn't even told his little brother that he lost his virginity. It worried Inuyasha. He knew their parents tended to give Sesshomaru a colder personality but never had it affected the brothers' relationship. He wondered if it was just him or if he did this to Naraku too.

Sesshomaru was fed up with being trapped in that damn house. He hadn't seen Naraku or any of his friends for a long time now. Fuck his parents, he was leaving.

He spent some alone time with Naraku for awhile before meeting a group of their friends at the mall. He enjoyed himself, he needed it. But when he came home his good mood was about to be stomped on.

"Sesshomaru," his father spat. "You knew you weren't supposed to leave."

"Yes, I did."

"Then why did you?"

"Because I didn't care."

"We wouldn't have to do this if you would just listen to us."

"You know I refuse."

"That's why we have an idea." Inutaisho stood up and quickly went to Sesshomaru. Before he knew what was happening, his phone was being taken from his pocket.

"Give that back!"

"No. You're going to call Naraku. Right here, right in front of us and you're going to tell him that it's over. If you don't, the consequences will not be good." Sesshomaru just stared at him. No…he couldn't do this. He loved Naraku. "And you better make it believable." Sesshomaru didn't know why but he grabbed the phone and dialed Naraku's number. "Put it on speaker."

"Hey Sessh," Naraku answered. "What's up?"

Oh no…he couldn't do this. This was too much. His father gave him a menacing glare though so he began to speak. "Uh, Naraku…there's something we need to talk about."

"Um, sure. Are you okay? Something sounds off."

Sesshomaru wanted to cry for what he was about to do but he held it back with all the willpower he had. He wasn't going to break down in front of those two. "I-I've been thinking…for awhile now and I-I think that we should…we should see other people."

"W-what? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Do I have to repeat myself? Naraku, you and I shouldn't be a couple anymore…it just isn't working…"

"Are you kidding me? You seemed fine earlier. Why didn't you bring it up then?"

"I…I was seeing if maybe it could still work…and then we were with a group. I thought about it and no, it can't."

"Yeah, whatever Sesshomaru." Naraku's voice was soft though. Soft and hurt…

_Please Naraku! It's not me who chose to do this!! Don't believe it! _"I'm sorry…"

"Yeah…bye Sessh."

He hung up. Inutaisho immediately took his phone out of his hand. He didn't even bother to fight.

"Are you happy now?" Sesshomaru whispered. "Are you happy that you managed to take someone who actually cares about me away from me?"

"This is for the better."

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes. "Yeah, okay."

He walked away from them and went to his room. He felt absolutely horrible. What was Naraku thinking right now? _He probably hates me. _Well why shouldn't he? He probably thought that Sesshomaru just wanted to waste his time… _I should've refused to do that. _If he truly loved Naraku surely he wouldn't have done that right? Yes, it was mostly his fault but his parents still played a part in that whole ordeal too. Why did they have to do that? Didn't they see how much it hurt Sesshomaru? Didn't they care? He hated them. _Maybe they hate me too. _That was the only reason he could think of for why they treated him the way they did. Were they really that against him having a boyfriend? What if it wasn't that at all? What if it was just because _he _liked guys? What if Inuyasha were gay? Would they care as much? At all? Maybe it was just Sesshomaru they wouldn't accept. Each question only led to another and Sesshomaru found himself thinking hard for the rest of the night. He didn't feel any better but he did come to one conclusion.

_If this is how my life is always going to be then I don't want to live._

--

The last five words of that thought stuck with Sesshomaru. His parents continued to be the same assholes as always. They continued to add to his pain. He no longer bothered with telling himself that their opinion mattered. There was no point for such. He started becoming jealous of his brother. He eventually convinced himself that if Inuyasha suddenly came out as gay then their parents would accept him but not Sesshomaru. The only good thing that happened was that Sesshomaru was able to explain what happened to Naraku. He told them that his parents forced him to do that. They got back together but Naraku knew something still wasn't right.

"Sesshomaru, are you okay?" Naraku would ask.

And Sesshomaru would always say the same thing. "I'm fine," he'd answer. And then he'd smile.

As the new school year started, Naraku became worried about Sesshomaru. He seemed to be closing himself off from him and all his friends. He tried talking to Sesshomaru multiple times but he could never get any answers. He thought of Inuyasha. The two brothers were close, perhaps he could talk to Inuyasha and find out what was going on.

--

"What did you want to talk about, Naraku?" Inuyasha asked. Inuyasha and Naraku were alone at school. This was Inuyasha's first year. Naraku told him to meet him but he didn't tell him why.

"Actually, about Sesshomaru," he told him. He noticed that Inuyasha tensed slightly.

"What about him?"

"You've had to have noticed…he's been closing himself off from other people, even me. Has he been acting strange with you?"

"He hasn't been talking to me as much…He's so quiet, granted he's never been much of a talker around others but around me…hell, the two of us would never shut up around each other."

"Is this because of your parents?"

"Does he talk to you about stuff like that?"

"No…he doesn't. Not lately."

"I thought he was at least opening up to you. It seems like the only time Sesshomaru even talks at home now is to defend himself from our parents. They're really bad."

Naraku was confused now. Why was Sesshomaru doing this? Was it solely because of his parents? Were they that horrible? He knew they were bad but…damn…

Both guys went home even more worried then before. They thought the other would know why Sesshomaru was acting so different. Because honestly…Sesshomaru's parents had never been the loving type. They thought he had just…accepted that. He'd been doing fine for the years before this one.

--

Sesshomaru sat in the park. He ditched school for the day. What was the point in going? His usually perfect grades were slipping and he didn't bother doing the work. He just…didn't care anymore. He didn't want to be around anyone either. He wanted to be alone with his thoughts. Though as of late they mostly centered around one sentence.

_I don't want to live._

Life was hard. Everything was just becoming too much for him to handle. He felt like an outcast in his own home. He didn't like being there at all. His parents hated him…that was apparent. And he didn't want to be around Inuyasha much. It just reminded him of how his parents hated him but loved Inuyasha. He still loved his little brother but he didn't want to be pained every time he looked at him.

He never wanted to be at school either. Students still bothered him. It wasn't intense bullying but it was enough to make Sesshomaru ditch. Some people would always be ignorant.

He thought about just running away before. He knew it wouldn't work though. He was only fifteen. He had no money and no car. He'd just be caught by his parents and then what? They'd punish him or make him go to more therapy. No, there was only one way to escape all this pain. And it was something Sesshomaru found himself wanting and willing to do more and more.

_I can't just do it without any last words though. I'll write letters…I'll write one for Inuyasha, Naraku…I guess I owe my parents one. At least to explain. They deserve it. _Though he was iffy on his parents. Sesshomaru starting planning on what he would write. He'd do the actual writing tonight.

Sesshomaru stayed up until three in the morning writing his letters. He felt they explained his decision well. He sealed each one then put them into his backpack. A few moments later his door opened quietly and he got startled.

"Oh…Inuyasha," Sesshomaru said.

"Yeah, me," Inuyasha muttered. He walked over and sat on his bed. "I noticed your light was on and I decided to see why you were up."

"Oh. I was doing homework but after that I didn't feel tired." A lie. Sesshomaru was tired but it wasn't like he ever got a decent night's sleep nowadays.

"You'll probably be tired in the morning. Gotta get up early for school."

"I'll be fine." Sesshomaru noticed Inuyasha was acting a little strange. "Is something wrong?"

"No…it's just, can I ask you something?"

"Go ahead."

"Why don't we ever talk anymore?"

"What do you call right now?"

"I don't mean just simple chit chat. We use to tell each other everything. Now it feels like I don't even know my own brother."

"I'm sorry you feel that way but I don't know what to tell you." _How can I tell you that it hurts to know that our own parents love you more than me?_

"Tell me why you suddenly hate me."

"I don't hate you." _I could never do that, little brother…_

"Then talk to me."

"There's nothing to talk about."

Inuyasha didn't get it. Why was his brother acting like this? He was acting so cold. "Fine…I'll go back to my room then. Goodnight, Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru just watched him go. There was nothing left to say.

--

Naraku walked Sesshomaru home the next day since Sesshomaru's parents weren't home and it was there that he gave him the letter.

"Naraku," Sesshomaru started. "I have something to give you."

"Um, okay." He pulled out the letter. "What's this?"

"A letter I want you to read. But only tomorrow morning."

"The morning? Why?"

"Because then it would ruin the effect."

"Oh, er, okay. If you want me to."

"Kay. I should get inside."

They leaned in for a kiss. Sesshomaru put in all the passion he could muster into it. This was the last time he'd feel Naraku's lips against his own and he wanted to cherish it. Even if it wouldn't matter in a few hours.

"Bye, Naraku."

"Bye, Sesshomaru."

Naraku was confused about this latest stunt and thought about it on the way home. He would listen to Sesshomaru and not open it until later but something inside of him was screaming that this wasn't right.

--

Sesshomaru sighed. He took out the two remaining letters. He went straight to his room and put the letters on his desk. He already had what he needed to commit the act. He would take those out later though. For now he just wanted his final hours to be peaceful. His parents worked until evening, Inuyasha was with his friends until later on…perfect. He would be undisturbed.

A couple hours later Inuyasha came home. _He was supposed to come later. _Sesshomaru stayed in his room. He wished he could see Inuyasha one last time but he knew if he did he would probably break down. Then Inuyasha would suspect something. So in his room he remained until he decided it was time. He got his backpack and got what he needed. A couple different friends of his were able to sell him a few bottles of pills. Sesshomaru wasn't sure how many to take so he was going to take them all. It wasn't like he could take too many.

He took a few deep breaths as tears gathered in his eyes. He couldn't prevent them from falling. Even if he wanted this…he was still saddened by it. _This is it. Now I can finally rest. _As he slowly reached a hand out, footsteps were suddenly heard. It sounded like they were running so Sesshomaru paused for a moment. The next thing he knew his door was forced open and the person who was there shocked Sesshomaru.

"N-Naraku?"

His boyfriend looked terribly upset. He was shaking and tears were streaming down his face. He held up the now-opened letter that Sesshomaru had given him earlier. "I opened it early, Sessh. I opened it before I was supposed to."

Sesshomaru was suddenly hit with a wave of emotions. Guilt, anger, pain. It was overwhelming him. His breath caught in his throat. Naraku ran to him and Sesshomaru dropped to his knees. His eyes were unfocused as he became lost in all the emotions he was feeling. Naraku wrapped his arms tight around Sesshomaru and held him close. Sesshomaru slowly looked from the pills on his desk to Naraku. His boyfriend truly was a mess. _What was I about to do? _Sesshomaru knew it would hurt people at first for him to be gone but seeing it…it made him feel horrible. More tears leaked from Sesshomaru's eyes. He latched onto Naraku and sobbed.

"W-why?" Naraku asked.

How was he supposed to answer that? Naraku thought he loved him but here he was about to commit an act that would destroy Naraku. And Sesshomaru hadn't even cared. _I'm so selfish. _"I-I just couldn't deal with it anymore," Sesshomaru whispered. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't apologize…I thought I was too late. I came here afraid of what I might find. I'm so glad you're okay. I love you so much."

"I-I love you too."

"You didn't take any, right?"

"No, you stopped me."

Naraku tried to hold back a sob. _If I had come just a few minutes later…_ "Sesshomaru, is this truly what you want? To die?"

Sesshomaru thought about what he said. It killed him on the inside to know that Naraku came here thinking he might already be dead. Guilt was washing over him. "N-no. Seeing you…no. I hurt you. I'm sorry."

Naraku held him. He had never been so scared as when he read that letter. At first he tried to ignore the feeling that told him to read it but it became too severe. He ripped it open and as he read each line he cursed himself for not doing so earlier. He came over but he thought he was too late. If he came and Sesshomaru was dead…he would never forgive himself for not stopping it. Then he saw his boyfriend standing there about to end his life and he was filled with pain but happiness that he was still alive.

Sesshomaru was sobbing hard. He buried his face into Naraku's neck but Naraku was trying to hold back his own tears. He needed to be strong right now, for himself and for his boyfriend. He looked up when he heard a noise. Inuyasha was standing in the doorway. He looked at the two crying guys on the floor then he looked at the desk. He saw bottles of pills and letters. It instantly clicked and Inuyasha went wide-eyed.

"S-Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha's voice was so soft.

_He's going to hate me, _Sesshomaru thought. Another wave of guilt and pain washed over him and he suddenly felt sick. He got up and ran past Naraku and Inuyasha. As soon as he made it to the bathroom, he threw up everything he had eaten that day. When he was done he walked into the hall. He couldn't face either one of them. _I'm horrible…_

Inuyasha was shocked. His brother…he was about…He could barely comprehend the information. He walked up to Sesshomaru. He was standing still with his back to him. He gently turned him around and hugged him. To think that he would've done it with Inuyasha there and he wouldn't even had known until it was too late…

"Inuyasha…" Sesshomaru whispered. It hardly even sounded like him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. There's nothing to blame you for."

"You're not mad at me, are you?"

"No. No, I'm not. I'm just glad you're okay."

_What have I done to these two? _"I'm going to be sick again." Sesshomaru ran off and threw up again. He fully realized the grief they would've dealt with had he gone through with ending his life. It was real now. He could barely walk when he was done. He stumbled towards the doorway and leaned on it.

"Naraku," Inuyasha said. "Take Sesshomaru downstairs and lay him on the couch. I'll be down there in a minute."

Naraku walked over to his boyfriend and picked him up. He had seen the trouble Sesshomaru had with walking. He did as Inuyasha told him. When Inuyasha came down he put a blanket over the now sick Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru started panicking. His parents would be home soon. What would happen then? Would Inuyasha tell them what he had tried to do? They would be angry with him. He would be punished for sure. _That's why they brought me down here. _If he were downstairs he wouldn't be able to hide in his room for the rest of the night.

"Take me upstairs," Sesshomaru tried to order.

"No," was all Inuyasha said. _It will be easier to watch him down here anyways. _

"Mom and Dad will wonder what's going on if I'm down here."

"I know."

"No…I don't want them to know. No…"

"Sesshomaru," Naraku said gently. "They're going to have to know."

"Promise me you'll stay here with me. I don't want to face them alone."

"If that's what you want. I'll stay right here."

Inuyasha was dreading when his parents would come home. He had no idea how they would react to Sesshomaru's unsuccessful suicide attempt. They hadn't been the world's greatest parents but maybe they wouldn't do anything to harm Sesshomaru further. He could only hope they wouldn't react angrily. If they did, Inuyasha would feel terrible. He knew Sesshomaru was worried about what was going to happen. Their parents were probably the main source of his pain. If they did something to make him feel worse…Sesshomaru would be sure to make another attempt at his own life, and he'd be sure to go through with it.

"Inuyasha," Sesshomaru called.

He looked at his older brother. He knelt down closer to his face so he could hear him talk. Naraku was sitting next to him gently rubbing his belly.

"Yes, Sesshomaru?"

"What's going to happen to me?"

Oh, how he wished he knew the answer to that. "The things that are making you sad, we'll fix them. You won't be sad anymore."

"I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"Of what Mom and Dad will do. What if they get angry and yell at me? They're going to hate me even more!"

Sesshomaru was starting to get frantic. "Calm down, Sessh. It's going to be okay. They're not going to do anything bad to you or get mad. I promise." _Please, let that be true._

"Okay…"

"Do you need anything?"

"Water…"

Inuyasha got up and filled a glass with water. As he sat back down near his brother, all three boys heard the door open.

_This is it. _"Sessh, do you want me to tell them what happened?" Inuyasha asked.

"I don't think I'm able to," he answered quietly.

As soon as Inutaisho and Izayoi walked into the living room they stopped. Sesshomaru was lying on the couch looking sick, Inuyasha was sitting next to him on the floor, and Naraku was gently rubbing him.

"What's going on?" Inutaisho demanded to know.

Inuyasha took a deep breath before he began to speak. "Sessh is sick right now. He's been throwing up for about the last hour. Naraku and I are watching over him and making sure he's okay." He had to stop for a moment to gather his thoughts. Tears started to well in his eyes as the words he was about say became clear. He stood up and walked over to them. He wouldn't be able to muster anything past a whisper. "Sessh tried to…he tried to kill himself." He walked back to his brother. Naraku had taken his place since Sesshomaru was beginning to panic again.

Sesshomaru looked up at his parents. He couldn't read their expressions. He had no idea what they were thinking right now and it frightened him. They walked towards him. _No, they're going to hit me. _He sat up and tried to get away but he couldn't. Both Naraku and Inuyasha blocked his way. Instead of hitting him though they dropped beside him. Izayoi immediately burst into tears and hugged him. Sesshomaru kept his gaze on his father though. There was still a possibility that his father would strike him. He did so even after his mother let go of him.

"Inuyasha," Inutaisho suddenly spoke. "The two of us need some time alone with Sesshomaru."

"Naraku promised he'd stay with me," Sesshomaru managed to say.

"He can come back once your mother and I are done talking go you."

All three teenagers were shocked. They expected Naraku to be kicked out but…they were going to let him stay…

"Okay," Inuyasha said. "Come on, Naraku."

The two of them went out to the front yard. Inutaisho faced Sesshomaru again. "I'm sorry," he whispered then wrapped his arms around his son. Sesshomaru was surprised and didn't know how to react.

"You're…you're not mad?" Sesshomaru mumbled.

"Gods no…I'm just happy you're okay. Sesshomaru, I'm so sorry. This is our fault. Your mother and I, we should've…we should've looked out for you more. The pain you must be going through because of this…"

Sesshomaru was speechless. Did his father just apologize? Why though? _I thought they hated me. If I died wouldn't it just rid them of a burden? _They seemed to care though…and it was real right? _Don't let them be pretending. Please, don't let this be an act._

Izayoi was slightly more hysterical then her husband. Inutaisho was trying to keep it together for their son but he was finding it difficult. He knew they had been tough on the boy for months now. Hell, tough was an understatement. But still, Inutaisho didn't think it would drive Sesshomaru to the point of suicide. Perhaps they were handling Sesshomaru's situation all wrong…_Perhaps? No, if we don't change things then this is only going to repeat itself. And next time…he'll be sure to succeed._

"Why?" Izayoi suddenly cried. "Why would you want to do that?"

"Why? You try not being accepted for who you are by your own parents," Sesshomaru hissed. His tone then changed into more of a whisper. "Try being told ever since you were a little kid that your behavior was wrong, that you had to act a certain way. Then deal with discovering you're gay only to be afraid of telling your own family which causes you to have a secret life. And then you finally feel brave enough to tell them only to be rejected. Your own parents tell you that you're faking it, that you're wrong, that you're sick…" Tears welled up in his eyes. "For months they try everything to turn you into something 'normal.' Therapy, being yelled at, getting in trouble for being who you are…" Sesshomaru couldn't stop the tears beginning to stream down his face. "After months and months of that you start thinking it will never end. That life is always going to be that miserable…that the pain is always going to be too much, it's always going to threaten to drive you mad, to the point that nothing seems worth going through that pain…When you've gone through that, then you'll understand why I did what I did." Sesshomaru started sobbing. He hated himself more for doing it in front of them but he just couldn't help it.

Inutaisho forced to keep himself from trembling. Their fault. It was all their fault. It was true…everything Sesshomaru said. Inutaisho and Izayoi had always believed that boys acted a certain way and girls acted a certain way. And never were they supposed to like the same sex. Ever since Sesshomaru had expressed his liking in feminine things and then in guys they tried to enforce that. They thought they could change him but now…now, they were forced to see how wrong that was. Because it was their own behavior, their own actions that almost cost their son his life tonight.

Inutaisho was overwhelmed with guilt, sadness, and relief. He hugged his son again in an attempt to soothe him. He had no right to even touch the boy after what he had done but he hoped Sesshomaru would allow the comfort he was trying to give now. He did. He sobbed in his father's arms, unable to stop himself.

"Why?" Sesshomaru cried. "Why?!"

They had no answer. Sesshomaru was asking why did they do everything they did. Nothing they could say would justify their actions. None of it would take away their son's pain. They could only try and fix things now.

"I'm sorry, Sesshomaru. I'm so sorry," Inutaisho whispered. "Both of us are." He knew that saying sorry wouldn't mean much to Sesshomaru. They would have to prove it through actions. It was still the truth though and Inutaisho felt the need to voice those words out loud.

"Now you're sorry." Inutaisho could feel fists hitting his chest. "You guys don't know what you've done to me!" His son pounded on his chest again. "I hate you guys!" Sesshomaru hit him with all his might although that wasn't much since he was feeling weak from becoming sick. He stopped hitting him and started crying again. He let his father hold him. It felt so foreign but he welcomed it anyways.

Inutaisho and Izayoi were hurt by his last remark but they knew they deserved it. They had put their son through so much, it was no surprise that Sesshomaru felt the way they did. Things had to change. There was no question about that.

"Sesshomaru…we're going to have a long talk. I want to talk to your brother first though." Sesshomaru said nothing. They had plenty of 'talks' before…who was to say that this one would be different.

Izayoi called Inuyasha back in and was followed by Naraku. "We want to talk to you alone, Inuyasha," Izayoi said.

"Naraku," Inutaisho said. "Will you take Sesshomaru to his room and stay with him? Inuyasha will be there shortly."

"Y-yeah," Naraku told him. He was still shocked at how he was being treated. _They must have realized how wrong they've been._ He went over to Sesshomaru and helped him upstairs to his room.

Inutaisho faced Inuyasha. "Come here. Tell us what happened."

Inuyasha was angry with his parents. It was their fault for what happened to Sesshomaru. "My brother almost killed himself because of his parents," he said coldly. He hoped it hurt them to hear that. Maybe he could make them feel at least a fraction of what Sesshomaru was feeling.

"Were you the one to stop him?"

"No. Naraku was." Inuyasha was also angry with himself. If Naraku hadn't showed up, he never would have known what Sesshomaru was up to in his room until it was too late. "He came all panicked. All he asked was 'where's Sesshomaru?' Then he ran upstairs. When I got there I just watched them sitting on the floor. I looked at Sesshomaru's desk and saw…all the pill bottles…and then I knew. It hit me that he was about to kill himself!" Inuyasha was on the verge of tears. "He got sick and started throwing up so I told Naraku to bring him down here. I took all the bottles from his room." A few tears started to fall down Inuyasha's face. "Why did you do that to him? Didn't you see how much you were hurting him? Do you even care?!"

"Inuyasha…"

"No! What are you going to do now? What other pain are you going to cause him?!"

"Things are going to change. They can't stay like this."

Inuyasha turned to the stairs. "You guys have hurt him so much, ever since he was a little kid you have. You're going to have to work damn hard to make up for that." He walked upstairs.

Inutaisho and Izayoi were left alone.

"Inutaisho…" Izayoi whispered. "What do we do?"

"We…we can't treat Sesshomaru the way we have." They were going to have to alter things they had believed in their entire lives. They were going to have to change the way they treated their sons.

"We've always told him that he wasn't supposed to act the way he does. We're going to have to live with the fact that what he does is wrong."

"Izayoi…what if we're wrong?"

"What do you mean?"

"He likes girl clothes, he liked girl toys when he was younger, and he likes other guys. But so what? Why does it bother us so much?"

"Because it…whenever Sesshomaru would ask us that, all we told him was because it was wrong."

"We said that because we couldn't find a good reason. We simply didn't like it so we treated him horribly. Look what we did!" Inutaisho clenched his fists. "This is sick…us, not him. Since he was little, we may not have liked his behavior but he's our son. Shouldn't we have just accepted him anyways?"

"…Yes. This can't continue."

"Not if we want our son alive. If we treat him the same as in the past then he'll make another attempt at his life again. And the results could end a lot more tragically."

"I don't want to lose our son."

"We may not agree or like some of the things Sesshomaru does but that's something you and I will have to deal with on our own. We have to accept him the way he his."

They talked for a long time after that. They decided that tomorrow they would take Sesshomaru to counseling. It wouldn't be like his therapy sessions which they would now end. This wouldn't be to try and change him, this would be to help him with his depression. They would deal with their own problems with their son's homosexuality. They would learn to live with it and to be supportive. Even if they had never been that loving to Sesshomaru, they realized how in the wrong they had been, how many mistakes they had made. Tonight they realized just how much pain Sesshomaru was feeling. Tonight they discovered that they almost killed their son and without change the next time wouldn't be an almost.

--

Naraku sat up against the wall next to Sesshomaru's bed. He was stroking the younger boy's bangs while his head rested in his lap. Inuyasha and Naraku were finally able to calm Sesshomaru down after he had started crying and yelling. Now he was beginning to drift to sleep.

"You guys aren't leaving me, right?" Sesshomaru mumbled.

"Both of us are staying right here beside you," Inuyasha told him.

"Okay…" A few minutes later his breathing slowed down and they knew he was asleep.

"What do you think is going to happen with your parents?" Naraku asked Inuyasha.

"I hope they see how fucked up they've been," he answered quietly. "Hell, they had to have seen."

"Will they change?"

"They have to. They can't be that awful…they can't. If they don't…"

"Then Sesshomaru will try this again."

"Yeah…he will. I hope that for his sake they will. It may have been drastic but maybe they've finally seen that they have been the messed up ones, not Sessh."

"I hope so too. You and I love him but…it's obvious that that isn't enough. Your guys' parents may not have ever treated him fairly but I think they'll change…"

Inuyasha got up and knelt next to Sesshomaru. _He looks so peaceful sleeping…even after what happened. _Naraku watched him as he reached his hand out to tuck a strand of hair behind Sesshomaru's ear. Unshed tears shined in his eyes. "Why didn't I see it?" Inuyasha suddenly whispered. "I'm his brother, I should've seen how miserable he was. I should've done something."

Naraku put his free hand on Inuyasha's shoulder. "He's very good at hiding what he truly feels. You and I know this. Besides…like I said, our love wasn't enough. With the way your parents treat him-have always treated him-this was bound to happen sooner or later."

They stayed in silence after that. A little while later Inutaisho came in. He stared at his older son before looking at Inuyasha.

"Izayoi and I are going to take him to see a counselor tomorrow."

"Oh yeah?" Inuyasha scoffed. "Like the therapy you've been forcing him to go to?"

"No. We're not going to take him to that anymore. This is going to help him with the depression and help him deal with everything."

"I'm sure he won't agree to it no matter what you guys say."

"We know. But we think it will help him. Not like how we thought the therapy would…" He sighed. "Your mother and I realize how much we have to change. After tonight things are going to be different. Are you both staying with him tonight?"

"Yes," Inuyasha answered for the two of them.

"Good. Even if he's asleep don't let him out of your sight for a minute." With that he left the room.

Naraku and Inuyasha decided to join Sesshomaru in the realm of sleep but they ended up staying awake for hours. They were lost in their own thoughts until sleep eventually claimed them.

--

Sesshomaru was the first one up in the morning. It was very early but he couldn't sleep any longer. He looked next to him at Naraku then at Inuyasha. He felt so ashamed. He was putting them through so much. _I'm awful. I don't even deserve the pitiful life I have. _He hated himself so much right now. He failed at ending his own pathetic life and he managed to hurt the two people he loved the most so much. He would have to think of a way to punish himself later.

He decided to take a hot bath while everyone was still asleep. He ran the water, locked the bathroom door, and eased his body in when the tub was filled. He closed his eyes. He thought about what his parents said. Even if they did claim that they were going to change, it didn't mean that it would actually happen. What if it was all just lies? A way to trick Sesshomaru? He wanted to believe them but after the way they had treated him his entire life, he just couldn't.

He began to scrub his body in an attempt to also wash away the pain, guilt, and shame. He began scrubbing harder until he was scratching at his skin. By the time he heard the frantic knocks at the door, his skin was almost bleeding in a few areas. He got up and wrapped a towel around his waist before opening the door slightly. It was Naraku.

"Are you okay?" he asked. Sesshomaru nodded. Naraku and Inuyasha had woken up and were worried when Sesshomaru wasn't there. Inutaisho did say to not let him out of their sight. "Can I come in?" When Sesshomaru walked away without closing the door, he took that as his invitation in. As Sesshomaru climbed back into the tub Naraku sat on top of the counter near the sink.

Naraku debated on whether or not to bring up the counseling. If his parents brought it up then he would definitely say no. But if he or Inuyasha could talk to him about it then maybe he would go. Sesshomaru needed help with dealing with this and his father seemed to mean it when he said it wasn't like the therapy.

"Your dad came into your room while you were asleep," Naraku started. Sesshomaru just swished the water around without looking up or speaking. "Y'know they mentioned something that actually sounded like a pretty good idea." When Sesshomaru didn't respond, he continued. "You must be feeling pretty sad right now. What if you went to someone who could help you? They would help make you feel better."

Sesshomaru thought about what he was saying. They wanted to take him for more 'help.' The same 'help' his parents had been giving him for months now. Well, he'd be damned if he was going to do that again.

"No," he told Naraku. He drained the water and stood up. Naraku handed him his towel.

"But don't you want to feel better? If you go, you will."

Sesshomaru put the towel around his waist and looked Naraku straight in the eyes. "Did my parents tell you that?"

"Well, yeah."

"They're lying. They just want to take me to the same place that they have been for months."

"…I think they're telling the truth. Ask Inuyasha about it."

"I'm not going."

"Sesshomaru, are you saying that you want to keep feeling like you are now?" Naraku was trying to choose his words carefully around Sesshomaru. He opened the door and went back to his room with Naraku following. Inuyasha wasn't in there, he had gone back to his own room. "Well, Sessh?"

"…No! I don't want to feel this way! But if they're lying, if they do one more thing to try and change me…I can't handle it. It's hard enough but if they do something else then…it'll just kill me."

Naraku put his arms around him and sat with him on the bed. "Come on, Sesshomaru. Please go. It won't be like how it has been." For a long time they just sat in silence. Sesshomaru wanted to believe it, he really did. But what if it was all a lie? In that case, he'd be sure to take his life without fail. He wouldn't be able to live with any more pain. If he went and they were telling the truth then maybe things would get better. If he went and they were lying, he'd kill himself. He could not go but if he didn't then it would only be a matter of time before his emotions overwhelmed him again. Either way he was fucked. He might as well go though. He had nothing to lose, his life meant nothing to him.

"I'll go," Sesshomaru muttered.

"Good, Sessh…"

After a few more moments of holding him, Naraku stood up. He got an outfit for Sesshomaru. He got dressed then the two of them went downstairs. His parents were there and Inuyasha came soon after Naraku and Sesshomaru did.

"Sesshomaru," Inutaisho started.

"Naraku already told me where you want to take me," Sesshomaru interrupted. "I agreed to go."

Inutaisho sat down next to his older son. "I promise you this won't be like the therapy. We're through with that."

"Okay…"

"Things are going to change." He looked at the other two boys. "We're going to leave soon." Inutaisho and Izayoi had already made an appointment hoping Sesshomaru would go.

Naraku saw that he should probably go. They needed time alone as a family. "Sessh," he said. "I think it's time for me to go."

"No," he whined. "Don't leave."

"You're going to be leaving soon and I think you need to spend time with just your family."

"When will you come back?"

"Whenever you want me to."

"Promise?"

"Yeah."

"Okay…"

He went to the door with Naraku so that they were out of everyone else's sight. Then Naraku gently kissed him.

"I love you so much, Sesshomaru. I always will."

"I love you too…I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. I'll see you later."

"Bye." He went back to the other room after Naraku left.

"We should leave now," Izayoi said. "Inuyasha, we'll be back later."

"Okay," he muttered. Then he got up and hugged Sesshomaru.

The three of them left after that. Sesshomaru was silent the entire way there but his parents left it alone. Sesshomaru felt a little nervous. He wasn't sure what to expect but he was almost positive he would hate it. It just better not be like that therapy.

--

Sesshomaru barely spoke during his appointment. He didn't want to be here, he just wanted to hide from the world. At least the woman who was trying to help wasn't an asshole like the therapist.

She told Inutaisho and Izayoi to keep all medications away from him as well as anything that could be used as a weapon. Sesshomaru was also to be around someone most of the time he was at home. Since they told her that he had a younger brother, she said that they should spend time together doing things to get Sesshomaru out of the house and outside. He would be going back in a week.

A few days passed. Sesshomaru had been relatively quiet. His family was worried, what if he was planning another suicide attempt? The real reason behind his silence though was that he was thinking. He wanted to die because the pain of his parents not accepting him was too much. They were constantly fighting and yelling and…he didn't want to go through that. He didn't want to continue feeling unloved and unaccepted. His parents had been so nice though for the past few days. It was like they actually cared. He didn't know what to make of it. He wanted to believe that they were changing but he couldn't allow himself to. If it turned out that they were lying and just went back to their old ways…Sesshomaru wouldn't be able to handle it. It would be too much for him.

The next evening he and Inuyasha were walking around the block. They started walking daily so Sesshomaru could have some fresh air. He was glad that they did, it calmed him.

"Hey, Sessh," Inuyasha said.

"What?" Sesshomaru asked.

Inuyasha was hesitant about asking this but he wanted to know the answer. "Did you really want to die?"

Sesshomaru was quiet. Inuyasha somewhat expected this. He was about to forget about it when a soft voice spoke. "I wanted to escape from the pain I was feeling. I didn't know any other way…"

"Mom and Dad won't change back on you."

Sesshomaru looked at his brother. "What do you mean?"

"They've changed since…y'know. But you're scared that they'll change back to how they've always acted. Don't be scared, Sessh. They're serious. This won't turn out to be some trick. They really are trying. It hurt them to see you so pained and they don't want you to feel like that. Don't be scared."

"I…I can't…"

"You trust me, don't you?"

"Yes, of course I do…"

"Then trust me on this. Things are going to be different. They'll be accepting."

Sesshomaru nodded as Inuyasha put his arm around him. He did trust his little brother. And if Inuyasha was telling him that their parents were changing for good then he'd allow himself to believe it…Inuyasha wouldn't lie to him…

--

Inutaisho and Izayoi slowly, very slowly, started seeing progress with Sesshomaru. He seemed to be getting better. They were dealing with their own feelings about Sesshomaru's behavior and they were learning to accept it. They started by letting Naraku come over. He couldn't spend the night though just like Inuyasha couldn't have his girlfriend sleep over. They treated Naraku nicely. They found that he was actually a good guy and they could tell that he treated Sesshomaru well. They still weren't sure whether they liked it when Sesshomaru would wear something girlish but if he wanted to then they'd let him.

Months later, Sesshomaru still thought about his suicide attempt everyday. Now that he looked back, he was grateful that he hadn't gone through with it. He had trusted Inuyasha when he said that their parents had changed for the good permanently. It was the best thing he could have done. It wasn't just something they did for a few days, it had been months now. His pain didn't just disappear overnight but it gradually faded. His parents accepted him now…something he had never experienced before. They even treated Naraku like part of the family. They really were trying. Things weren't perfect but he knew that they wouldn't be able to change everything they once believed in right away. One thing he could say though was that things were better now than they had been in his entire life.

--

Sesshomaru lay in the grass at the park. He was alone but he was content just thinking quietly. A year ago he had almost killed himself. He still felt a small amount of pain when he thought about it but it didn't consume him like it used to. His life was good now. He had a good relationship with Inuyasha again, he was still happily together with Naraku, and his parents finally accepted him. It took them a long time but they fully accepted him for who he was. They no longer believed something was wrong with him, that he was making it up, or that he was sick. No, he was just a guy who didn't fit the stereotypes. And that was perfectly fine.

"Hey, Sessh!"

He sat up. Naraku was walking towards him. "Hi. You were supposed to be here like ten minutes ago."

"Sorry," Naraku apologized. "Kagura was holding me up. You wanna go now?"

"Yeah."

They were going to Sesshomaru's house. Inutaisho and Izayoi were going to a party and would be gone until late at night. It would just be Sesshomaru and Inuyasha…and whomever else they decided to invite.

"Good. I've been dieing to get you alone…"

They kissed for a few moments before pulling away.

"Oh yeah? And why is that?" Sesshomaru asked.

Naraku just winked and started to walk in the direction of his house. Sesshomaru smiled.

Yeah, life was definitely better.

* * *

Wow…that took me a long time to write. A few things I'd like to say…

I know not every gay guy is feminine and I know not every feminine guy is gay. That's just the way I wanted to portray Sesshomaru here. And it's too bad not everyone's own story has a happy ending. I wanted to write this for a while now so here it is…I have a feeling that I'm going to get flamed for this. Well, I hope you guys enjoyed this and that it wasn't a total waste of your reading time…because damn was this a long one-shot. If you did indeed find that this was a waste of your time…sucks for you ;-)


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